Is Personal Growth a Danger to Your Relationship?

Interesting perspective on growth in a relationship. Is it always good?

“We like to think that, in the romantic ideal, people love each other out of a keen appreciation for their partners’ most fundamental selves. They continue to love each other through mutual growth and change based on a profound devotion to who each other really is. As the partners grow, they make choices that enable them to change with each other and their relationship, making it stronger with every change. But we can never know another person (or even ourselves) that perfectly, and since our selves are what we make of them, we can change them. While we hope our partners continue to love and appreciate us as we change, it is important to acknowledge the possibility that we can change them fundamentally enough to make even the most deeply appreciative partner wonder who we are. One can be legitimately surprised when the person he or she loves seems to be slipping away, replaced by another person who looks just the same but behaves very differently. This can be tragic, but in the end it may lead both people, who once may have been a wonderful fit for each other, to find new partners who are better fits for who they are now.” via Is Personal Growth a Danger to Your Relationship? | Psychology Today.

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