Category: Psychology

The Quiet Power of Owning What You Can Control at Work

A professional organizes a task list and folders at a desk, focusing on controllable work amid surrounding clutter.

Workplaces can be maddeningly good at teaching helplessness. Priorities collide. Communication arrives late. Managers are too busy to manage. The problems are real—but after a while, naming them can become a substitute for doing anything about them.

Bruce Tulgan offers a useful reset: control at work rarely means controlling the whole system. It means becoming much more deliberate about the smaller territory that is actually yours—your preparation, your conduct, your output, and your response when the system misfires.

That distinction matters. Personal agency is not corporate absolution. You can recognize broken processes, weak leadership, or impossible workloads without surrendering your ability to act.

Continue reading “The Quiet Power of Owning What You Can Control at Work” →
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Happiness Is Often What Happens When You Stop Avoiding Your Life

A woman pauses at a sunlit crossroads overlooking mountains, symbolizing choices about happiness, purpose, and connection.

Happiness is often treated like a prize hidden somewhere beyond the next achievement, relationship, purchase, or reinvention. But a more honest question may be simpler: on an ordinary day, with the life you actually have, are you comfortable being you?

In “Are You Happy Being You?”, psychotherapist Robert Taibbi argues that unhappiness is usually not a mysterious condition. It is the residue of something else: problems left unresolved, a relentlessly critical inner voice, a fading sense of purpose, or the loneliness of feeling unseen.

That framing matters because it turns happiness from a verdict on your personality into a clue about your life. You may not be broken. You may simply be carrying too many things you have postponed, punished yourself for, outgrown, or tried to endure alone.

Continue reading “Happiness Is Often What Happens When You Stop Avoiding Your Life” →
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The Good Kind of Selfish: When Honoring Yourself Is Healthy

Person looking into a mirror with one hand over their heart, reflecting healthy self-honoring and the shadow side of ego

“Selfish” is one of those words that arrives with its verdict already attached. We hear it and picture greed, entitlement, or someone taking the last slice without so much as a glance around the table.

But what if that reflexive condemnation causes us to confuse self-absorption with something essential: the ability to recognize and honor our own needs?

In “Honoring Thy Self: The Unsung Virtues of Selfishness,” clinical and forensic psychologist Stephen A. Diamond argues that some people do not need to become less selfish. They need to learn how to be selfish in the right way.

Continue reading “The Good Kind of Selfish: When Honoring Yourself Is Healthy” →
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What We Stop Seeing: Habituation, Gratitude, and the Return of Tefnut

Tefnut-inspired lioness beside returning water and rain in a desert landscape

Most of us don’t notice what holds our lives together. We notice the urgent email, the strange noise in the car, the person who disappoints us. We rarely notice the clean water, the functioning lungs, the patient friend, or the colleague who quietly keeps the whole enterprise from wobbling.

That isn’t simply ingratitude. It is also how attention works. Familiar, nonthreatening things fade into the background so we can respond to what is new. Habituation makes daily life possible—and, at the same time, makes it dangerously easy to forget what makes daily life possible.

In Until It’s Gone: Escaping the Trap of Habituation, social scientist and therapist Karima Joy gives this very modern problem an ancient face: Tefnut, the Egyptian goddess of moisture and rain.

Continue reading “What We Stop Seeing: Habituation, Gratitude, and the Return of Tefnut” →
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When AI Gets Smarter, What Happens to Our Own Intelligence?

We are pouring extraordinary amounts of money, electricity, infrastructure, and ambition into making artificial intelligence more capable. But how much are we investing in the people expected to use it wisely?

That imbalance sits at the heart of a provocative new essay in Psychology Today by Cornelia C. Walther. Her concern is not simply that AI is accelerating. It is that the human abilities AI is meant to extend—attention, memory, judgment, imagination, language, and agency—can weaken when assistance quietly becomes substitution.

That distinction matters. A tool can help us reach farther while still leaving us responsible for the reaching. But when the tool routinely remembers, drafts, interprets, and reasons for us, our role can shrink from creating thought to merely approving output.

Continue reading “When AI Gets Smarter, What Happens to Our Own Intelligence?” →
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Retirement Isn’t the Finish Line. It’s a Rewrite.

Retirement is often sold as a permanent vacation. The reality is richer—and messier.

Leaving full-time work can bring welcome freedom, but it can also unsettle the routines, relationships, identity, and sense of purpose that work quietly supplied.

Psychologist Jasmin Tahmaseb-McConatha offers a more honest frame: retirement is not a finish line but a process of rebuilding meaning. That means making room for both relief and grief, then creating a satisfying new reality one day at a time.

The most useful takeaway is wonderfully ordinary. A walk, coffee with a friend, a creative project, meaningful work, or a story shared across generations can become the architecture of a good day. These are not ways to fill time; they are ways to reclaim connection, contribution, and belonging.

Who am I now—and what still makes me feel useful, connected, and alive?

If retirement is approaching—or already feels less simple than advertised—this thoughtful essay is worth your time.

Read: Creating a Satisfying Retirement Experience by Jasmin Tahmaseb-McConatha, Ph.D., at Psychology Today.

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10 Signs That Someone Is Trying to Gaslight You

Cracked wall mirror reflecting an armchair, lamp, and cluttered coffee table

Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic that causes someone to doubt their perception and reality. The article “10 Signs That Someone Is Trying to Gaslight You” outlines key indicators that may suggest you are a target of such behavior. These signs include persistent denial of facts, emotional manipulation, and efforts to isolate the victim from support networks. Recognizing these behaviors is crucial for self-empowerment and protecting one’s mental health.

To understand more about these warning signs and how to navigate such situations, read the original article: 10 Signs That Someone Is Trying to Gaslight You

 

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Why Myths Still Matter: The Odyssey, the Ego, and the Self

Here’s what ‘The Odyssey’ can teach us about the limitations of ego and the journey toward the self.

In the article “Why Myths Still Matter: The Odyssey, the Ego, and the Self,” the author explores the profound lessons embedded in Homer’s epic, “The Odyssey.” It delves into how the journey of Odysseus serves as a metaphor for understanding the limitations of ego and emphasizes the importance of self-discovery. The narrative illustrates that true wisdom and fulfillment come from humility and introspection rather than pride and self-importance.

For those interested in deepening their understanding of these themes, be sure to read the original article here.

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Ted Lasso Is Back: Why We Still Need to “Believe”

As Ted Lasso returns, its message feels timely: Growth often happens through vulnerability, empathy, and relationships that help us rewrite our stories. The show’s themes of vulnerability, empathy, and supportive relationships are more relevant than ever. The article discusses how these elements contribute to personal growth and the importance of believing in oneself against all odds. To explore these insights further and see how they resonate in today’s world, be sure to read the full article here.

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Why You Can’t Help Sharing the Things You Love

Stone causing splash and ripples on lake water at sunset

I am a curator as this website will attest and this article caught my eye…

“You’ve sent a song to someone at 11 p.m. You’ve pressed a book into a friend’s hands. A new study suggests you weren’t showing off. You were trying to give something away.”

The article “Why You Can’t Help Sharing the Things You Love” discusses the intrinsic motivation behind sharing experiences, music, and books with others. It highlights a recent study suggesting that when people share things they love, they are not seeking validation or trying to show off, but rather expressing a desire to give and connect with others. This act of sharing reflects a fundamental social behavior where individuals aim to enhance relationships by spreading joy and personal meaning through their interests.

Go to the source and read the whole article: Why You Can’t Help Sharing the Things You Love

 

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How to Be a Living Unison: D. H. Lawrence on Harmonizing the Conflicting Parts We Live With

“The great paradox of personhood is that the sum is simpler than its parts. We move through the world as a totality, fragmentary but indivisible, clothed in a costume of personality beneath which roil parts perpetually fighting for power, perpetually yearning for harmony. The person making the choices, the person bearing their consequences, and the person taking responsibility for them are rarely the same person.”

If this resonates wiht you, go to the source and read the entire article by Maria Popova: How to Be a Living Unison: D. H. Lawrence on Harmonizing the Conflicting Parts We Live With

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2 Commonly Overlooked Signs of Intelligence

Glowing brain with thought bubbles containing languages, mathematical formulas, coding, and creative symbols

Researchers studying language, cognition, and verbal processing have identified behaviors that correlate with higher cognitive ability but that are often mistaken for their opposite.

Researchers examining the connection between language, cognition, and verbal processing have found certain behaviors that are actually indicative of higher cognitive ability. Surprisingly, these behaviors are frequently misinterpreted as signs of lower intelligence. The article highlights two specific signs that are often overlooked in assessing intelligence. For a deeper understanding, refer to the full article on Psychology Today.

Source: 2 Commonly Overlooked Signs of Intelligence

 

 

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What Is EMDR Therapy? Can It Really Help Me?

Living room corner with beige armchair, small wooden table, multiple green plants, and large window with curtains

Heard a lot about the power of EMDR, but not sure how it works or if it’s truly right for you? Here I answer your questions.

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a therapeutic approach designed to help individuals process traumatic memories and reduce their emotional distress. The article explains that EMDR involves a structured eight-phase approach where the therapist guides the client through recalling distressing events while simultaneously engaging in bilateral stimulation, typically through guided eye movements. EMDR has been found effective for various trauma-related issues and offers a unique alternative to traditional talk therapies. The author emphasizes the importance of finding a qualified practitioner to ensure the therapy’s effectiveness and suitability for individual needs.

Go to the source and read the whole article: What the Heck Is EMDR Therapy? Can It Really Help Me?

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Carl Jung: An Introduction

Source: Carl Jung Offers an Introduction to His Psychological Thought in a 3-Hour Interview (1957) | Open Culture

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Purpose Is Simple; Courage Is Hard

Many people think purpose is something you find. It’s not. It’s something you do—and the difference changes everything.

In the article “Purpose Is Simple; Courage Is Hard,” the author emphasizes that finding one’s purpose is not about discovering it but rather about engaging in purposeful actions. The piece argues that many individuals mistakenly believe purpose is something to be uncovered, whereas it is actually woven into the actions we take daily. The article highlights the transformative impact of recognizing this distinction and encourages readers to embrace courage as a crucial element in pursuing their purpose in life.

Go to the source and read the whole article: Purpose Is Simple; Courage Is Hard

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Why We Self-Sabotage

Buried in your unconscious may be beliefs that sound wise but sabotage your life, like “Others have it worse, so I can’t complain” or “My parents did their best; I can’t be upset.”

The article “Why We Self-Sabotage,” published in Psychology Today, explores the powerful yet often subconscious beliefs that can lead individuals to undermine their own well-being. It highlights common self-defeating thoughts, such as the belief that one’s problems are insignificant compared to others’ struggles, or the notion that loyalty to one’s parents should negate feelings of distress. These beliefs prevent individuals from acknowledging their emotions and taking necessary steps toward healing and growth. The article emphasizes the importance of recognizing these harmful thoughts to break free from self-sabotaging behaviors.

Go to the source article: Why We Self-Sabotage

 

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What Does “Main Character Energy” Actually Mean?

“Main character energy” emerged as a trend to reclaim agency but it may bypass the work needed for genuine transformation.

“Main character energy” refers to the trend of viewing oneself as the protagonist of one’s life, emphasizing self-agency and personal narrative. While this mindset can empower individuals to take charge of their lives, the article cautions that it may sometimes overshadow the deeper, necessary work required for real transformation. Genuine change often involves confronting challenges and engaging in introspection, rather than simply adopting a surface-level persona.

Go to the source to read the entire article : What Does “Main Character Energy” Actually Mean?

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Take Charge of Your Compulsive News-Watching Pessimism

Bad news getting you down? Understanding and using rational emotive behavior therapy may help you take control of your despair.

The article from Psychology Today discusses how bad news can negatively impact mental health, leading to feelings of despair and compulsive news-watching behaviors. It introduces Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) as a practical approach to help individuals combat these negative thoughts and emotions. By understanding and applying the principles of REBT, people can gain control over their reactions to distressing news and develop healthier emotional responses. The article encourages readers to take charge of their consumption habits to foster a more optimistic outlook.

Go to the source to read the entire article: Take Charge of Your Compulsive News-Watching Pessimism

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Tribalism Overwhelms Reason Because It Keeps Us Safe

Many have noted that we are getting more tribal. But few have recognized how our instinctive need for belonging to a tribe stems from the most basic instinct of all: survival.

The article “Tribalism Overwhelms Reason Because It Keeps Us Safe” discusses the increasing tendency toward tribalism in society and attributes this behavior to our fundamental survival instincts. It highlights how the innate desire for belonging to a group, or “tribe,” is rooted in the need for safety and security. This tribal loyalty can lead to irrational behaviors and biases, overshadowing logical reasoning in decision-making processes. Ultimately, the article emphasizes the complex relationship between tribalism, safety, and the difficulties it presents in a diverse world where collaboration across groups is essential.

Go to the source to read the entire article: Tribalism Overwhelms Reason Because It Keeps Us Safe

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Domestic Dating: Reigniting Romance at Home

Couples don’t need a “night out” to reignite romance. Enjoying the comforts of married life is often best experienced at home.

The article “Domestic Dating: Reigniting Romance at Home” emphasizes that couples can revive their romance without the need for extravagant nights out. It suggests that the comfort and intimacy of home can provide the perfect environment for couples to reconnect. By embracing simple activities and enjoying each other’s company within their home, couples can enhance their relationship and find joy in their everyday lives together.

Go to the source to read the entire article: Domestic Dating: Reigniting Romance at Home

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The Weaponization of Psychological Labels in Relationships

As the language of psychology has become more integrated into everyday conversations, I hear more and more examples of “label weaponization.” There’s a better way to communicate.

The article “The Weaponization of Psychological Labels in Relationships” discusses how psychological terms and labels are increasingly being used in everyday conversations to manipulate or undermine individuals in relationships. This “label weaponization” can lead to misunderstandings and harm, as individuals may feel reduced to their labels instead of being seen as whole persons. The article suggests that fostering healthier communication practices, such as avoiding labeling and focusing on feelings and behaviors, can lead to more constructive relationships.

Go to the source to read the entire article: The Weaponization of Psychological Labels in Relationships

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