See on Scoop.it – Living Business
Why pity-seeking becomes a habit, it can interfere with our happiness and our relationships.
Todd Lohenry‘s insight:
“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.” ~Mark Twain. Read that again. Did you see comfortable or uncomfortable? The first time I read it I thought it was another take on the classic Eleanor Roosevelt quote "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." but Twain’s quote speaks to the need for self-compassion…
See on tinybuddha.com
Bright, shiny objects! 
For some people, their identity is wrapped up in self-pity. They come to therapy session after therapy session “to get better” but do not do any of the things that will get them moving in a healthier direction. Consciously, they think they want to improve, but unconsciously improvement means a lack of attention- which is what they do NOT want. Usually those individuals who thrive on pity have needs that were massively unmet in childhood. They never got the proper attention and nurturing at a time when they needed it the most. Now they are adults and are capable of taking care of their own needs, but still feel like a lonely, lost, needy child. If they could come to realize that the attention that they are seeking is not empowering and the reward that they are seeking through self-pity can never be achieved (because they are trying to get something back that was lost so long ago- parental nurturing), then they may empower themselves to see that they are the only ones holding themselves back today.
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