My senses are relentless. Because they feed my thoughts. My thoughts lead to speculation. And, eventually, I will ask the question, “Are you okay?”

I’ve lived with this heightened awareness and (excessive?) empathy for as long as I can remember. It doesn’t feel like it’s my choice to look for those signs in others of discomfort, pain, inner struggle.

I just feel it. Notice it.

I see.

And I struggle with deciding who and when to offer some type of support.

I want to fix it all.

I can’t.

I have my own issues that need fixing. I meet very few fellow empaths. People that are willing to carry my struggles with me. But even when others try, I struggle to convey the depth of the pain.

In contrast, I feel the depth of pain in others. Sometimes without them saying a single word.

I see how heavy the darkness…

This is not easy.

A year later, when I follow up with Jade, she emphasizes how the ritual of uncoupling helped her to see the writing on the wall. “At first I thought it was a little New Age-y, but I was also proud to be doing it and even shared it with some friends. We were doing something right, despite all the wrong that had come before. I often wondered, How is he going to leave? Is he just one day going to wake up, say, ‘Okay, bye,’ and walk out the door? The separation ceremony put an end to my ruminations. I desperately needed a way to help me accept that he loved another woman and it was really over.”

The complete article

Esther Perel — Ideas.ted.com

Image source