I have already told my partner Lori that when I die, I’d like her to leave me in a dumpster on the Notre Dame campus near the football stadium but that’s just a throwaway. I’d really like her to spread my ashes on the Cliffs of Mohr while she blasts Spirit in the Sky from a boombox. Yup. That’s the ticket…
On the original 1970 concept album of Jesus Christ Superstar—which served as the “original cast” recording before the show ever hit the stage—the lead guitar duties were shared by two primary musicians, both of whom were members of Joe Cocker’s backing group, The Grease Band:
Henry McCullough: He played both electric and acoustic guitar. McCullough is perhaps the most famous guitarist associated with the album; he later joined Paul McCartney & Wings and provided the iconic solo on “My Love.”
Neil Hubbard: He played electric guitar. Hubbard was also a session veteran who later played with Roxy Music and B.B. King.
While both contributed heavily to the rock-opera’s gritty sound, McCullough is frequently credited with many of the more prominent, bluesy lead lines.
Reconciliation isn’t a cinematic moment. There are rarely swelling violins or a sudden, tearful embrace that wipes away twenty years of silence or friction. In reality, trying to reconcile with a father is a gritty, unglamorous process of dismantling old armor—one rusted plate at a time. I know, I’ve been there and done the work.
It is perhaps one of the most complex emotional maneuvers a person can attempt. It requires balancing the child you once were with the adult you are now, all while looking at a man who is likely just as flawed and frightened as anyone else.
Forgiveness is often sold as a cinematic moment—a tearful embrace, a sudden shedding of the past, and a clear path forward. But when the person you are forgiving is a formerly abusive father who has genuinely changed, the reality is far messier. It isn’t a single event; it’s a grueling, confusing, and deeply personal negotiation between the child you were and the adult you are now.
Reconciling with a father who is “no longer that person” presents a unique psychological hurdle. It requires holding two seemingly impossible truths at once: He did those things and He is not doing them now.
Lou Holtz was a retired American football coach, motivational speaker, and author, born on January 6, 1937, in Follansbee, West Virginia. He began his coaching career in college football, working with various teams, including the University of Massachusetts and the University of Arkansas. Holtz gained national prominence during his tenure as the head coach at the University of Notre Dame from 1986 to 1996, where he led the Fighting Irish to a national championship in 1988.
Holtz is known for his unique coaching style, ability to motivate players, and his keen understanding of the game. After retiring from coaching, he became a celebrated speaker and author, sharing his philosophies on leadership and success. Holtz was inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame in 2008, leaving a lasting legacy in the world of sports. Throughout his life, he has emphasized the importance of attitude, effort, and integrity in achieving one’s goals.
The author writes “I have proudly earned every candle on my birthday cake, and I am grateful for each day I am given. Every day I wake up is already a wonderful day.”
The article “Gaining Clarity Through Aging” explores the positive aspects of aging, emphasizing how each year brings valuable life lessons and greater appreciation for daily experiences. The author reflects on the wisdom gained through life’s challenges and the importance of gratitude for each day lived. Emphasizing a positive outlook on aging, the piece advocates for embracing life’s moments and understanding that the journey brings clarity and fulfillment.
Forget the fairy tale. Discover the real science on how marriage affects your bank account, brain health, and long-term happiness.
The article “Should I Get Married? The Science Behind the ‘I Do'” explores the tangible effects of marriage on various aspects of life, including finances, mental health, and overall happiness. It moves beyond romanticized notions of marriage, presenting empirical evidence that illustrates how being married can enhance financial stability, improve brain health, and contribute to long-term contentment. The piece encourages readers to consider the scientific research surrounding marriage rather than relying solely on fairy tale ideals.
Too many of us lean on a couple of only a few sources for our happiness—our jobs, our partners, our children. But there is a danger in doing this?
Never put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.
Anonymous
In the article “If You Want to Be Happy, Have Multiple Baskets,” the author emphasizes the importance of diversifying sources of happiness beyond just jobs, partners, and children. Relying too heavily on a few elements for emotional fulfillment can be risky, as it can lead to disappointment and a lack of resilience during tough times. By cultivating multiple avenues for joy—such as hobbies, friendships, and personal growth—individuals can create a more stable and enriched life. The piece encourages readers to seek a broader range of experiences that contribute to their overall happiness and well-being.
‘To thine own self be true’ is a line from Act 1 Scene 3 of Shakespeare’s play, Hamlet. It is spoken by King Claudius’ chief minister, Polonius as part of a speech. Here’s the whole thing…
“There, my blessing with thee. And these few precepts in thy memory Look thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue, Nor any unproportioned thought his act. Be thou familiar but by no means vulgar. Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, Grapple them unto thy soul with hoops of steel, But do not dull thy palm with entertainment Of each new-hatched, unfledged comrade. Beware Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in, Bear ’t that th’ opposèd may beware of thee. Give every man thy ear but few thy voice. Take each man’s censure but reserve thy judgment. Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy, But not expressed in fancy—rich, not gaudy, For the apparel oft proclaims the man, And they in France of the best rank and station Are of a most select and generous chief in that. Neither a borrower nor a lender be, For loan oft loses both itself and friend, And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry. This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. Farewell. My blessing season this in thee.”
I could feast on these words for a long, long time…
In a world full of facts, fakes, and feelings, critical thinking is what keeps us from mistaking popularity for truth.
The article “Why Critical Thinking Is the Most Important Skill in Your Life” emphasizes the necessity of critical thinking in today’s world, where misinformation, emotions, and popularity can easily cloud judgment. It argues that critical thinking enables individuals to discern factual information from falsehoods, helping them make informed decisions and judgements. By honing this skill, one can navigate through the complexities of life with greater clarity and accuracy, ultimately leading to more thoughtful and rational outcomes in both personal and societal contexts.
Do you define your job as stressful? Good. That means that a simple mental shift can help you reduce work stress.
Work stress isn’t about what happens at work; it’s about how we frame and perceive what happens. When you describe your workday with more nuance, you stop contaminating calm moments with unnecessary tension.
Many people quit jobs not because of income but because of incivility. Thankfully, there are ways to attract and retain talent.
The article “The High Cost of Workplace Incivility” explores how workplace incivility can drive employees to quit, often prioritizing a respectful environment over financial compensation. It discusses the detrimental effects of a toxic culture, which can lead to high turnover rates and decreased productivity. The piece emphasizes the importance of fostering a civil workplace to attract and retain talent, highlighting strategies that organizations can implement to promote respect and collaboration among employees.
Use the ‘Ben Franklin effect’ to appear more likable.
The article “How Benjamin Franklin Turned His Enemies Into Friends” explores the psychological principle known as the Ben Franklin effect. This effect suggests that asking someone for a favor can lead them to like you more, as it encourages them to rationalize their action and perceive you in a more positive light. The piece details how Franklin, during his interactions with a rival, strategically asked for a book as a favor, which ultimately softened the opponent’s feelings towards him and fostered friendship. The article highlights the power of the Ben Franklin effect in transforming relationships and enhancing likability.
Remaining stuck in your relationship, job, or life can feel complicated, but you start living fully again.
“Are you living the life you want or the life you have learned to tolerate? Read this again. Tolerating life is not the same as living it. And joy does not come from fixing everything. It comes from aligning with yourself. When that happens, life may still challenge you, but it will no longer feel heavy. Because you are no longer carrying a lie.”
The article “Are You in a Situationship With Your Life?” explores the feelings of stagnation individuals may experience in their relationships, jobs, or lives in general. It compares this feeling to being in a “situationship,” where a lack of commitment leads to confusion and dissatisfaction. The author emphasizes that, while feeling stuck can be complex, taking proactive steps toward personal fulfillment is essential for moving forward and truly living. The article encourages readers to recognize their circumstances and make changes that foster a more meaningful and engaged existence.
Discover why you have no energy and learn the science-backed COM-B framework for energy management. Practical strategies for high-achievers to reclaim vitality.
The article “Why Do I Have No Energy? The Science-Backed Energy Management Framework for Overwhelmed High-Achievers” explores the reasons behind low energy levels and introduces the COM-B framework, which stands for Capability, Opportunity, and Motivation-Behavior. It provides practical strategies aimed at high-achievers to help them reclaim their vitality and manage their energy more effectively. By understanding the science behind energy management, readers can implement actionable steps to enhance their overall well-being and productivity.
Adverse experiences don’t only happen at home. What about the things children face on the other side of the front door?
The article “The List of ACEs Should Be Longer” discusses the various adversities children can face outside of their homes, highlighting that adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) extend beyond domestic environments. It emphasizes the importance of recognizing and addressing these external factors that contribute to a child’s development and overall well-being. The author advocates for a more comprehensive understanding and acknowledgment of ACEs to improve support systems for children.
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) refer to a range of stressful or traumatic events that occur during childhood and can have significant long-term effects on an individual’s health and well-being. These experiences may include physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, neglect, and household dysfunction such as domestic violence, substance abuse, mental illness, or incarceration of a family member. Research has shown that the presence of ACEs increases the risk of developing a variety of health problems and maladaptive behaviors in adulthood, highlighting the importance of understanding and addressing these early adversities to promote healthier outcomes for children as they grow.
At first glance, a checklist seems mundane—a simple grocery list or a set of chores. However, in the worlds of high-stakes performance (aviation, surgery, engineering) and personal productivity, the checklist is considered a “cognitive safety net.”
It is arguably the cheapest, most effective tool available to combat the limitations of the human brain. Here is a breakdown of why creating checklists is so valuable.
Systems to help you be more diligent but worry less.
In the article “How to Improve Your Preparation by Thinking Like a Pilot,” the author emphasizes the importance of meticulous preparation and disciplined practices to enhance performance. Drawing parallels between aviation and other fields, the piece highlights how pilots utilize systematic approaches to manage risk, improve decision-making, and reduce stress. By adopting similar strategies, individuals can cultivate diligence while alleviating unnecessary worry, leading to more effective outcomes in various aspects of life. The article advocates for structured planning, checklist usage, and reflective practices to optimize readiness and tackle challenges with confidence.
Editors note: There’s another important aspect of being a pilot that I think the author may have overlooked and that is the value of using a checklist. I have a friend who’s a private pilot and has been flying for over 60 years. He uses a checklist every time he takes off…
Bright, shiny objects! 
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