The Time We’re Losing

We lose time when we check our phone every time it beeps and bings, especially if someone we love is sitting beside or across from us. We lose time every time we turn on the glowing box instead of pursue our future visions and goals. We throw away time every time we agree to an hour meeting when 20 minutes will do. We lose time chasing that extra six cents a gallon we heard they were getting for gas across town, not stopping to think that we’re only getting back $1.30 for that effort.

Every time we don’t say sorry first and end the stalemate, we are losing time. Every time we focus on our regrets, we lose time. Whenever you look in the mirror and judge yourself a failure, you are losing time. Strangely, this made me think of golf balls.

There is not one golf ball in the world that judges itself a failure. Sometimes they land in the hole. Other times, they get lost in the woods. But they are still primarily the same object. The same is true for you. Failure is something about a moment. Failure is a great thief of time. Learn. Embrace your learning. Move. Time only goes in one direction, and that’s away from you.

Make that call. Pick up that course of study. Practice that new idea. Experiment with that plan. Accept that you are who you are, and that change isn’t the goal: awareness and adaptation are the goals.

Set your phone to silent. Check it as infrequently as you can stand. Before we all had cell phones, our children all lived. The boss wants you to be responsive. Fine. Be responsive, but not a slave.

Time, friends, is the most difficult of the currencies to leverage, and we all spend it like it’s free.

This doesn’t mean “hurry.” This means “live.” Live in the way that suggests you know what time it is, with or without a watch. Because it’s your time. And that’s what matters while you still breathe.

And for the bonus round? Think about how you can use your time to extend value to people after you have stopped breathing. That’s why the world is thinking so much about Steve Jobs today. For every flaw you want to mention, for every truth about his temper or his choices, he built a legacy, more than once, with the time he had.

via chrisbrogan.com

October 6, 2011 0

Faith Is Greater Than Fear!!

via thedailylove.com

October 6, 2011 0

Farewell, Steve Jobs…

October 5, 2011 0

Don’t Go To A Chinese Restaurant For Nachos

Some shiny thoughts from lifecoach Christine Hassler…

I have a question for you: if you were craving nachos, would you go to a Chinese restaurant? My guess is your answer is no because you know that in a Chinese restaurant, they don’t serve nachos. In fact they would probably not even have the ingredients to make them even if you asked. If you really wanted nachos, you would go somewhere where they serve them to ensure that you could get what you were craving, right?

Now think about where you go when you are craving support, encouragement, guidance, unbiased advice, loving feedback or acknowledgment. Do you go to people who are consistently able to dish out what you are hungry for? Or do you find yourself going to people who do not have what you need on their menu so you find yourself consistently discouraged and disappointed?

Most of the time, we know what we are craving when we reach out to someone else. It is useful to be honest with ourselves as to whether or not that person will be able to satiate us. If someone in your life has consistently reacted and responded to you in a way that has not satiated your needs, chances are they do not have the ingredients to do so. Continuing to go to that person hoping that someday what you are hungry for appears on their menu is like continuing to walk into a Chinese restaurant when you want nachos. You may get fed, but not with what you truly wanted to eat.

If you want to be validated and acknowledged, do not go to someone who traditionally dishes out criticism. If you are craving to be listened to, do not go to someone who loves to serve up advice. If you are hungry for some positivity and upliftment, do not bother reaching out to someone who tends to see the glass half empty.

This can be especially challenging when you really want a significant person in your life like a parent or romantic partner to be able to give you what you desire from them. However, sometimes they just don’t have the ingredients to do so. It does not make them wrong; it just makes them who they are, so enjoy what they do have to offer you. Our relationships with others improve when we just accept what someone can and cannot dish out.

It is an act of self-love to be responsible and honest about how we get our needs met rather than expecting them to be met. There are MANY people in your life who are totally capable of dishing out the support, encouragement, guidance, unbiased advice, loving feedback or acknowledgment that you are craving. But in order to consume it, you have to stop going to the people who do not have it on their menu.

via thedailylove.com

So many of my challenges in life come in exactly this way! I’m expecting good nachos from a Chinese restaurant. Thank you, Christine, for this brilliant analogy…

;-)

October 5, 2011 0

10 Essential Tips For Great Communication With Your Kids

Children in Jerusalem. — Image via Wikipedia

An open and honest continuing dialogue with our children is crucial for parental success. When walls are created and information stunted, we are not able to forecast trouble looming on the horizon. Lack of proper communication also stymies solid bonding between parent and child. Many family tragedies could be avoided simply by talking. Here are some thoughts to help bring the joyous sounds of constant family chatter to your home…

via allprodad.com

Follow the ‘via’ link to get the 10 tips…

October 4, 2011 0

What You Send Out Is What You Get Back

“Send out judgment and low energy and that is what you’ll attract back. Remember, when you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself as someone who needs to judge. The same applies to judgments directed at you.”

– Wayne Dyer

via thedailylove.com

October 4, 2011 0

10 Ways to Get Your Wife to Trust You

Two brothers live at home with their parents. Don, 17, has a strict curfew. Dan, 16, is never told when to come home. The difference is trust.

Mom and dad know Dan will be home around 10:00. If he’s going to be late, he always calls. But Don never lets them know what he’s up to and he’s lied consistently for years.

For all his openness and detailed communication, Dan feels free as a bird. Don, however, even though he keeps many secrets, always resents what he experiences as a short leash.

Marriage is a similar dance of trust and credibility. Partners who demand “freedom” and push the limits to see how tethered they really are never experience the sense of liberty experienced by those who respect their spouse, keep no secrets, and keep one-another informed about everything.

Non sequitur? Not really. Trust is a sticky issue, but it’s an irreplaceable element if relationships are to experience the kind of freedom and confidence that can only be grounded in mutual respect.

Here are 10 ways to foster trust with your wife…

via allprodad.com

Follow the ‘via’ link if you’d like the 10 ways. Me? I’m working on it…

October 3, 2011 2

Live for today

A good reminder from Natalie Grant…

October 3, 2011 0

We Date [or Marry] Who We Are!

Mastin Kipp shares this…

We date at the level of our self-esteem. Your relationship is a direct reflection of your own self-love and self-worth…

Let me be clear – the only way we should have to change is to be more authentically ourselves. This means compromise, of course, but this also means not abandoning ourselves to please another.

The common question seems to be: “How can I change myself so this will work”, and the response is “Don’t change yourself – BE YOURSELF”.

Many Seekers are terrified of being alone and of the unknown. And I understand, it can be hellishly uncomfortable in there. But if your needs aren’t being met in a relationship, it’s not the other persons fault. The responsibility is on you to communicate your needs and to choose someone who honors you, cherishes you and loves you.

If you don’t love, honor and cherish yourself, you will settle and your needs won’t get met.

To be a Seeker we must get comfortable with the unknown and with letting go of toxic relationships. We must step into the Faith that we can create the life we truly desire, not as we change to please others, but as we step more into our own authentic selves. This means communicating our needs, having higher standards around the people we are dating and stepping into our own self-love and self-care.

Of course in any relationship we have to compromise and find a middle ground. This is part of being in relationship. But this blog is aimed at the thousands of folks who have written in asking how they can change to please other people. Please yourself first and then you will attract someone who is pleased with you.

This means embracing the unknown and being okay with letting go of something or someone that isn’t meeting your needs.

Ask yourself this question: “If I REALLY loved myself, what would I do?”

via thedailylove.com

October 3, 2011 2

Leap! And The Net Will Appear!!!

“Leap and the net will appear.”

– Julia Cameron, Cameron is the best-selling author of “The Artist’s Way”.

via thedailylove.com

October 3, 2011 2

Facebook 101

via mashable.com

October 2, 2011 0

The Key To A Drama Free Life

via thedailylove.com

October 2, 2011 0

Begin It Now!!

“That the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.

Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has Genius, Power and Magic in it. Begin it now.”

– Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, was one of the greatest writer’s and polymaths the world has seen. He hailed from Germany

via thedailylove.com

October 2, 2011 0

The 1904 World’s Fair

via todayifoundout.com

October 2, 2011 0

In the hope of reaching the moon…

“In the hope of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet.” Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965)

October 2, 2011 0

Forgiveness

I refuse to amuse the lie…

October 1, 2011 0

Conquer the Fears Lurking in the Dark Corners of Your Mind

I was reading Confessions of a Shopaholic recently and ran across a passage that struck a chord with me … the main character is avoiding thinking about increasingly urgent letters from banks and creditors, trying to push these worries out of her mind:

“I’m well aware that at the back of my mind, thumping quietly like a drumbeat, are the twin horrors of Guilt and Panic.

“Guilt Guilt Guilt Guilt.

“Panic Panic Panic Panic.

“If I let them, they’d swoop in and take over. I’d feel completely paralyzed with misery and fear. So the trick I’ve learned is simply not to listen. My mind is very well trained like that.”

This passage struck a chord because I’ve been there. I’ve had those horrors of guilt and panic at the back of my mind, many times.

I’ve done it with debt — I let the letters from creditors pile up, trying to ignore them, not wanting to face them.

I’ve done it with my health, knowing I was growing overweight, not wanting to think about the things I was eating.

I’ve done it with smoking, knowing it was bad for me, but trying not to think about it, puffing away.

I’ve done it with projects that I knew I should be working on, but didn’t want to think about them … because I was afraid, for some reason, to face them.

Does any of this sound familiar? Do you have fears lurking in the deepest, darkest corners of your mind? Fears you don’t want to face and try to push back, closing your eyes so you don’t have to see how horrible they are?

If so, I highly recommend you face them now. Be bold and brave. Bring them out into the light of day.

It’s an amazing relief when you actually do face these fears. They actually turn out to be not so bad, not so overwhelming or intimidating. It’s a huge load off your shoulders — you’re liberated from your fear!

via zenhabits.net

Follow the ‘via’ link above if you’d like the rest of Leo’s thoughts…

October 1, 2011 1

The Half Step That Will Change Your Life

Good stuff from Leo Babauta this morning…

You’d be surprised to know how many emails I get where people are stuck in their lives.

They’re broke, or unmotivated, or in a job they hate, or they can’t find their passion, or they can’t get motivated to get healthy.

And they don’t know where to start.

It hurts to read these emails. It brings back to life the pain I lived through not too many years ago, when I too was stuck.

I know the feeling of despair when you are unhappy with your life and don’t know how to change. When you’ve tried lots of changes, but couldn’t find the discipline to make them stick. When you feel crappy about yourself because you know you should get off your butt and start improving your life, but you’d rather put it off for another day.

Problems go away when you ignore them, right?

I also know that there is really only one way out of this mire of despair.

It’s to take an action, no matter how tiny.

You don’t need to fix everything in your life right now. You don’t even need to fix one thing.

You just need to do one little, miniscule, almost nothing thing.

Make a list. Go outside and take a walk. Get rid of some of your junk food. Clear off your kitchen table. Cancel something tomorrow so you can make time to create something, no matter how small.

Don’t do all of these. Do one. Or half of one, or one thousandth. It doesn’t matter how small — the smaller, the better.

Take that first step. Celebrate that first step. Love the step, not the destination. That step, even the motion of taking the first foot off the ground and moving it forward — that’s everything.

That’s the truth, and you’ll not read it in many self-help books: put every microparticle of your existence into that half step, and be nothing but that half step, and love it with all you have … and your life has changed.

With this half step, everything is different. You haven’t achieved any goals … but you’ve moved. You haven’t created something amazing … and yet, more than ever before, you have.

You’ve created beauty and joy and movement where none existed before, where previously only constriction and paralysis and confusion lived. You have changed the world.