Change Your Attitude About Goals

Full story at: Change Your Attitude About Goals « Positively Positive.

January 1, 2013 0

A New Year’s Ritual for you!

Christine Hassler shares this:

For the past eight years I have shared my New Year’s ritual to let go of the past and clarify my focus for the future. I know many of you have joined me in this ritual and I love hearing about your experiences. And this year to amp up this powerful process I have recorded a guided visualization and meditation as an extra special addition! Go here to get it. In this twelve- minute journey, I guide you through identifying the lessons and blessings from 2012 so you can clearly envision and begin creating what you’d like to experience in 2013.

Now onto my New Year’s tradition . . .

The following ritual does not involve making any kind of resolutions, which are usually promises to do something “more, better, or different.” We vow to exercise more, get a better job, fall in love, or find a different way to handle our stress. But does this really do us any good? Most of us start the New Year with the greatest of intentions, yet by March (or even by the second week in January) we may not find ourselves so resolved. We revert back to old patterns and beat ourselves up for not sticking to our resolutions. Could there be a way to ring in 2013 that serves us better?

YES! We can resolve not to make any resolutions and instead engage in a co-creative ritual of reflection and intention setting.

I invite you to follow this step-by-step process and amend it any way that inspires you:

Get the process here: A New Year’s Ritual for you | Christine Hassler, Inspirational Speaker, Life Coach and Author of 20 Something, 20 Everything and 20 Something Manifesto.

December 31, 2012 2

Your New Normal

Craig Harper offers this insight:

What’s Normal?

Like many things ‘normal’ is personal. You have yours. I have mine. The guy over the road has his. And the lady reading the news has hers. We all have our own. We may not have consciously built it but it’s uniquely ours nonetheless. Sometimes our normal empowers us. And sometimes, it keeps us trapped like a miserable bird in an invisible cage. Sometimes it drags us up. And sometimes it drags us down. Sometimes it connects us to others. And sometimes it alienates us. Things like individual habits, behaviours, standards, beliefs and thinking demonstrate that there is no universal normal. Your normal beliefs won’t be mine. My normal language won’t be yours. Your normal thoughts won’t be mine. My normal expectations might scare the crap out of you. Your normal rituals might be my crazy behaviour. My normal yummy breakfast might be your bland, abnormal, tasteless crap. Your normal relaxing yoga class could be my sixty minutes of painful contortion. My normal job might be your professional nightmare. And my normal Saturday night could be your social suicide.

…and so on.

And while comparing normals is interesting stuff, the real issue here is not how our respective normals do or don’t align but rather, whether or not your normal aligns with the life you want to live, your core values and the results you want to create in your world.

Here’s what we know about normal:

1. It’s personal.

2. It’s optional.

3. It’s change-able.

4. It matters.

Do you need to create a new normal this year?

via Your New Normal.

December 31, 2012 0

5 Questions To Ask Yourself About Your New Year’s Resolutions

The Happiness Project

Full story at: 5 Questions To Ask Yourself About Your New Year’s Resolutions..

December 31, 2012 0

Facing fear…

Melody Beattie writes:

“How do you face fear?” a woman asked.

“I suggest doing one thing each week that scares you,” I said, even though Eleanor Roosevelt said to do one thing each day that scares you.

Action: Make a list of your fears, known and unknown. Then tell yourself, someone else, and your Higher Power what’s on the list. This idea is borrowed from the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. Next make a list of ten things, like deep breathing or praying, that help you feel peaceful, or at least help you make peace with the fear. Learn to recognize fear. Then figure out what you need to do to make yourself feel safe.

We each have similar—and different—things on our list of fears. Sometimes our fears are deep rooted. They got stuck in us from our past. We each have different ideas and levels of actions we’re ready to take to be brave and face fear. For some, it might be riding in an elevator. For others, it might be expressing how they feel.

It’s important to know your limit. But sometimes it helps to push yourself a little when your fears limit you too much.

I’ye traveled alone to Pakistan, Algeria, and East Los Angeles, and I was perfectly safe. Yet, in my own home, I’ve given myself a concussion, burned myself, and fallen down the stairs.

There are certain things we need to do to responsibly protect ourselves. I recently asked a friend to pray for my safety on a potentially hazardous journey. She said, “I’ll ask. But know that God is already with you.”

Wherever we go, God’s there. Make yourself safe wherever you are.

Gratitude Focus: Instead of resisting our fears or feeling ashamed of them, let’s try reverse psychology and be grateful each time one comes up.

via December 31.

December 31, 2012 0

10 Really Lame Ideas & Beliefs To Let Go Of

Danielle LaPorte writes:

1. Let go of the belief that you’re not worthy of your desires. You are worthy of your desires.

2. Let go of the fear-based notion that you have to say yes to everything in order to be liked, loved, profitable, charitable, kind. Fewer yeses can actually help you be more generous with your giving.

3. Let go of promises that you’ve outgrown. If a commitment is keeping you smaller or duller or safer than the person you’ve become, then it’s not serving anyone.

4. Let go of the insidiously subconscious standard that how you were treated in the past is how you should be treated now. Your family, your old boy/girl/friend, or your last boss may not be the best metric by which to measure how you want to be treated. You’ve grown — your standards for love should grow with you.

5. Let go of the incredibly sexy-dullifying belief that you’ll never get what you want the most. (See #1: You are worthy of your desires.)

6. Let go of the material shit that you just don’t like. In fact, if you don’t LOVE it, make a plan to get rid of it. Too tight, too shabby, brings up bad memories. As me n’ my girls habitually remind each other: “Fuckin-get-ridda-it.”

7. Let go of the concept that art is a luxury. It’s a necessity. A home without human-created art is like a face without eyes.

8. For the love of life, let go of the idea that there’s not enough time. You are the source of time in your life.

9. Let go of the crippling notion that your needs are merely wants. If you really really really deeply truly want to be seen, heard, met, or respected — well then, that’s probably a veritable need that you must have fulfilled to be … fulfilled. (And you should set out to have that need met on a daily basis.)

10. Let go of the “what sucks” story in your life. There’s lots to bitch about — and you should bitch — bitching can be incredibly life-affirming, clarifying and galvanizing. But then stop bitching.

Create a story of your future and tell it over and over again. A future that you’re looking forward to — a future of fulfilled desires, enoughness, plenty of time, and works of art everywhere.

Source: 10 Really Lame Ideas & Beliefs To Let Go Of | Danielle LaPorte: white hot truth + sermons on life

December 31, 2012 3

A New Road

Nina Boski writes:

It’s time to get on a new road, making a shift in your life as 2013 approaches! The wonderful thing about a new beginning is we get a chance to let go of the past and start fresh. We usually begin by making changes, cleaning out the old (closets or desks usually involved). It’s also a wonderful time for contemplation and reflection before we move into the outward energy of a NEW YEAR!

If you find yourself having a lot of challenges, there is an old saying, “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.”

I would like to add a line: “It makes you stronger only if you embrace your life lessons with the willingness to learn and grow with an open heart.”

Meaning, in order to take a new path, you have to do the work and shift internally, as well. It is an inside and outside job—this thing called “life.”

Let us also begin 2013 with a commitment to ourselves, and then extend it to the rest of our communities and the world.

Full story at: A New Road « Positively Positive.

December 31, 2012 0

Laying the Foundation

Melody Beattie writes:

The groundwork has been laid.

Do you not see that?

Don’t you understand that all you have gone through was for a purpose?

There was a reason, a good reason, for the waiting, the struggle, the pain, and finally the release.

You have been prepared. The same way a builder must first tear down and dig out the old to make way for the new, your Higher Power has been cleaning out the foundation in your life.

Have you ever watched a builder at construction? When he begins his work, it looks worse than before he began. What is old and decayed must be removed. What is insufficient or too weak to support the new structure must be removed, replaced, or reinforced. No builder who cares about his or her work would put a new surface over an insufficient support system. The foundation would give way. It would not last.

If the finished product is to be what is desired, the work must be done thoroughly from the bottom up. As the work progresses, it often appears to be an upheaval. Often, it does not seem to make sense. It may appear to be wasted time and effort, because we cannot see the final product yet.

But it is so important that the foundation be laid properly if the fun work, the finishing touches, is to be all that we want it to be.

This long, hard time in your life has been for laying of groundwork. It was not without purpose, although at times the purpose may not have been evident or apparent.

Now, the foundation has been laid. The structure is solid.

Now, it is time for the finishing touches, the completion.

It is time to move the furniture in and enjoy the fruits of the labor.

Congratulations. You have had the patience to endure the hard parts. You have trusted, surrendered, and allowed your Higher Power and the Universe to heal and prepare you.

Now, you shall enjoy the good that has been planned.

Now, you shall see the purpose.

Now, it shall all come together and make sense.

Enjoy.

Today, I will surrender to the laying of the foundation – the groundwork – in my life. If it is time to enjoy the placement of the finishing touches, I will surrender to that, and enjoy that too. I will remember to be grateful for a Higher Power that is a Master Builder and only has my best interests in mind, creating and constructing my life. I will be grateful for my Higher Power’s care and attention to details in laying the foundation – even though I become impatient at times. I will stand in awe at the beauty of God’s finished product.

Source: Blog | Just For Today Meditations | Maintaining A Life

Letting Go of Resistance (toddlohenry.com)
Step 2 – Letting Go to a Higher Power (beingabeautifulmess.wordpress.com)
Putting our Life on Hold (toddlohenry.com)
Day 30: The Proof (thelivingnotebook.com)

December 30, 2012 3

How to Reflect on 2012 and Set Yourself Up for Success in 2013

The good folks at Stepcase Lifehack share this:

How to reflect on the previous year

Find yourself a peaceful and quiet location to reflect on the past year, a place where there are no distractions around so you can really focus your thoughts. An ideal location would be somewhere outside of your own home—perhaps a beach or a nearby park. Find somewhere you can set your mind free.

Take a notepad and pen with you, or if you’re into technology, take your iPad or similar device.

Write down your answers to the questions below, but note that these questions are just a guide: depending on your individual circumstances, you may want to add your own questions that are more specific or relevant to your life.

Ready? Here goes:

What are the 5 things of 2012 that you are most proud of?

What new connections have you made, and how have these shaped your life?

What experience has made you the happiest?

Who has made you happiest?

What have been the best moments in your career this year?

What changes would you make to your career in 2013?

What challenges did you overcome this year? How did you do it?

What has held you back from achieving what you wanted to do this year?

What can you do in 2013 to ensure this doesn’t happen again?

What habit did you acquire this year that has made a difference?

What habit has prohibited you from achieving what you wanted this year?

What habit do you want to enable in 2013 that will make a difference?

What was your biggest mistake in 2012? What have you learned from this?

What else have you learned this year?

What are 3 words that sum up your year?

If you were to live 2012 all over again, what would you do differently?

Add your own!

The Next Steps

Now that you have reflected on the past year, keep your answers at the front of your mind, and file your notes about them nearby so you can refer to them regularly. Your reflections will become the starting point for setting your goals for the year, and those goals for 2013 will be much more targeted and more relevant to what it is that truly makes you happy.

It only takes 20 to 30 minutes to do this, and this short reflection can have a huge impact on your overall well-being, your learning, and your success for 2013.

Let me know how it goes as I would love to hear your experiences! 2013 is going to be an amazing year. I can feel it!

via How to Reflect on 2012 and Set Yourself Up for Success in 2013.

December 29, 2012 0

Creating A New You For The New Year!

Terri Cole writes:

It is an annual occurrence. We run on autopilot from Thanksgiving through Christmas, and then around December 26, we start to think about new habits we want to create and bad habits we want to ditch. We evaluate what hasn’t been serving our purpose and what we need to change in order to be more fulfilled. For some reason, we have a difficult time implementing new strategies in the present moment. It’s as if we must wait for a momentous occasion that clearly marks new beginnings.

Does the split second between December 31 and January 1 possess some kind of transformational magic? Do we really need a specific calendar date to create our best lives?

Nope. We really don’t.

The biggest challenge is realizing the potential for renewal you have in every moment. If you focus on staying present instead of mulling over the past or anxiously awaiting the future, you can harness the power of your intention and make what seems impossible, possible. Obsessing about what you did and did not do in the past and fearfully projecting into the future is your fear mind limiting your potential.

Once you release the fear, you can stay rooted in the here and now and develop present moment awareness. You can begin to truly discover what you want more and less of in your life based on who you are NOW rather than on how you have behaved in the past.

Recognize you are a work in progress, which is a process that thankfully never ends. Realize that at any moment you can declare a Do Over—to create that magic split second of New Year’s transformation—any day of the week.

You can decide right now that negative experiences from your past will not predict your future. Now is not then, and no matter how familiar it may feel, this present moment has never happened before. Instead of fearing what may happen, harness the mind-blowing power of your intention to create what you want to happen.

Whether it’s now because New Years is right around the corner, or at any other time throughout the year, here is a great exercise to get you on the path to sustainable change.

Full story at: Creating A New You For The New Year!.

December 28, 2012 0

New Year/New Life!

Ponder this as you make your plans for 2013:

December 27, 2012 1

What To Do When Your Buttons Get Pushed!

Christine Hassler writes:

I recently served as someone’s button pusher after I made a request of him that he found upsetting. Caught off guard, the coach/nurturer in me immediately wanted to make it better. However, I know that the best thing to do when I’ve pushed someone’s buttons (which consequently push my own buttons of fearing that I am not liked) is to take responsibility for myself and give the other person space.

Fortunately he is someone who is committed to growth and took the time he needed to process what happened. When he called me the next day to explain how my request made him feel, what it triggered, share what he learned and make a request of me, it was done from an incredibly authentic and neutral place. There was no blame. That made it possible for me to really hear and understand, communicate vulnerably my experience, and be totally open and willing to meet his request.

This beautiful communication was possible because we both chose to take personal responsibility rather than taking things personally.

My encouragement to you is to make the same choice whenever your buttons get pushed. Take responsibility for your upset. Know that the other person did not CAUSE you to feel the way you are feeling. We are all 100% responsible for how we feel.

Set aside time to process what you are feeling on your own, rather than lashing out, pulling away, stuffing it while pretending everything is okay or immediately attempting to talk it through with the other person when you are still feeling sad or angry (trust me, communication is WAY easier after you’ve worked your process).

Source: What To Do When Your Buttons Get Pushed!

http://youtu.be/jq-78QTZwQA

December 26, 2012 0

To The Voice In My Head…

Robin Lee writes:

To the voice in my head:

I used to believe you when you told me I was ugly and pathetic. I would look into the mirror and notice the lines, the creases, the scars, the circles under my eyes, the gray hairs.
I would look in the mirror and declare to myself, “I am old, undesirable and ugly.”

I used to believe you when you told me I was damaged. You would remind me of all of the things that happened to me — all of the things that I was ashamed about in my past. I would look at my life and all of these things that happened and think about what a broken piece of crap I was.
I would declare to myself, “I am tainted and damaged.”

I used to believe you when you told me that nobody would want to be with me.
I would look at all of my weaknesses and declare to myself, “I am unworthy of love.”

I used to believe you when you would tell me that if only I was better — then I could have what I desperately wanted from you.
I would declare to myself, several times a day, “I am not good enough.”

Then one day, I woke up feeling very depressed. I looked around at my life and easily could see all that I had to be grateful for, but it didn’t seem to matter. I couldn’t seem to stop declaring the horrible things that I chose to believe that you kept telling me — over and over and over again. What we allow will continue — Isn’t this so? I allowed it for so long, it didn’t seem to want to stop. Not even for a second.

Until one day…
I asked myself if all you told me was really true. Was it really true that I was old, undesirable and ugly? Was it really true that I was tainted and damaged? Was it really true that I was unworthy of life and not good enough?
I realized that day — It was only true as long as I declared it to be so.

I began from that day forward writing on sticky notes ….

I AM LOVEABLE. And so it is.
I AM GOOD ENOUGH EXACTLY AS I AM RIGHT NOW. And so it is.
EXPERIENCES IN LIFE BROUGHT ME TO WHERE I AM TODAY. And so it is.
I AM WHOLE AND COMPLETE. And so it is.
I AM DESIRABLE. And so it is.
I AM VITAL. And so it is.
I AM BEAUTIFUL. And so it is.

I posted those sticky notes around the house, in my car, on my laptop. Every time I would see them I would take a big deep breath and often find myself in tears. I wanted desperately to believe these things, but the damage was so deeply engrained. Something inside told me to keep affirming, keep breathing — and at some point it would pay off. Like seeds being planted in a garden — in its own time, the intention I had would grow.

Each and every day I would hear your nagging voice tell me the reasons why I wasn’t worthy of enjoying my life — and each time I heard your voice I would put my hands on my chest (heart chakra) — breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth and say out-loud, “Stop!!”

I would breathe again and say out loud one of the positive affirmations I wrote above…
I am beautiful. And so it is.
I am vital. And so it is.
I am desirable. And so it is.

Then one day, I woke up and heard your voice louder than ever. I barely got out of bed and you started nagging me with your, “You look old today. If people only knew the real you, nobody would ever want to be with you.”
I took a deep breath and stated out loud, “Excuse me, are you talking to me?” Following that question was a profound silence.

Thank you for all that you taught me – it’s time to say goodbye.

Source: To The Voice In My Head…!

December 25, 2012 1

The Inside Scoop from ‘Passion Whisperer’ Marie Forleo!

Kris Carr interviews Marie Forleo…

Takeaway question: How would I act if I were the best in the world at what I do?

The Inside Scoop from ‘Passion Whisperer’ Marie Forleo!.

December 23, 2012 0

Office Spaced

One man’s struggle to stay sober and keep his recovery during the holiday season: via Office Spaced.

December 22, 2012 0

The Quest to Peace: During the Holidays and Throughout the Year

One of the most powerful symbolic moments of humanity was on display in the most unlikely of places—the cold, mud-filled trenches along the Western front during the Great War on Christmas Eve 1914. The day had seen very little shelling or rifle fire, and, by nightfall, the shooting had completely stopped.

Later that night, the British troops could hear sounds floating across the frozen battlefield: “Stille Nacht. Heilige Nacht. Alles Schlaft, einsam wacht.” They did not understand the words, but the tune was unmistakably familiar. As they peered into the darkness over the edge of their waterlogged trenches, they saw what appeared to be candles and Christmas trees with lights on the edge of the German trenches, which were only thirty to seventy meters away. The British responded in kind and started singing Christmas carols as well.

As Christmas Day broke, the fraternization began in earnest after one German infantryman appeared holding a Tannenbaum—a miniature Christmas tree glowing with light. In his strong German accent, he declared, “Merry Christmas. We not shoot; you not shoot.”

Full story at: The Quest to Peace: During the Holidays and Throughout the Year « Positively Positive.

December 21, 2012 0

Batch Related Tasks into a Single Chunk

30sec Tip: Batch Related Tasks into a Single Chunk.

December 21, 2012 0

How to Turn Off Negative Thoughts in Your Mind

Barring psychological illness, we are all largely responsible for our own emotional health and well-being. What does that mean? That what we say to ourselves over and over for days, weeks, months, and sometimes years, has a dramatic effect on how we see ourselves. This also contributes to many of the mental health disorders we see rampant today: what we choose to have continually playing in our brains stays there, and there’s a real problem when we start buying into the negative thoughts we have about ourselves.

I discovered how powerful the effect of conditioning is firsthand when I was listening to some oldies the other day on the radio—I was amazed at how quickly I could belt out the words to songs I hadn’t heard in decades. How could I remember all those lyrics from so long ago? Because I was conditioned by them. I listened and sang those words day in and day out for what seemed like forever, until they were burned into my brain cells, and some of those old songs even provoked strong feelings in me as I took a quick trip down memory lane.

The mind is a powerful thing, and in a nanosecond, it can elevate or crush our mood because of the beliefs lurking behind our feelings.

If you think I’m kidding, try it yourself: think of an old song, or even the lyrics to one of your favorite television shows. Those of us who are old enough can belt out the opening line to The Beverly Hillbillies in our sleep.

So, what does all this have to do with our emotional health? Everything.

Many of us have problems with negative thoughts playing on the channel of our minds, but if you’re engaging in it consistently, and you believe it, it could be eroding your sense of self-esteem. Here are a few beliefs that indicate you may need to switch the station:

I’m a loser

I’m not good enough

I don’t deserve….

No one likes me

I suck at relationships

I’m a failure

Negative thoughts conjures up bad feelings and hooks you into believing that what those old tapes in your head are playing is actually true. In short, it brings your focus to your failures, and that gets you nowhere.

What can you do?

Full story at: How to Turn Off Negative Thoughts in Your Mind.

December 21, 2012 0

20 Life-Changing Questions

Craig Harper writes:

Ask them, answer them, do something.

1. What’s in my control (and what’s not)?

2. What’s not working in my life right now?

3. In relation to my goals, what’s the best use of my time?

4. How do I create connection with this person?

5. Where am I investing my emotional energy?

6. Why will it be different this time?

7. What do I have to be thankful for?

8. What can I learn in this situation?

9. How am I contributing to this problem?

10. What fear do I need to face?

11. How do I self-sabotage?

12. What’s my plan for when the motivation wears off?

13. What do I need to let go of?

14. What is success for me?

15. What is their reality?

16. What do I need to unlearn?

17. Do my beliefs empower me or limit me?

18. What are my core values?

19. Is my life a reflection of those values?

20. What do I want my life to look like in twelve months?

via 20 Life-Changing Questions.

December 20, 2012 3

Why You’re Not Meeting Your Goals

Lesley Knowles writes:

To be successful in reaching a goal, you must know and surpass the things that may hinder you from getting there. Aside from changing or improving the things that will be discussed below, you need to save a sufficient amount of determination, persistence, and patience.

Read on and study the following taboos in goal-setting. If you’re guilty of one, most, or all of them, immediately act, think of and apply ideal and effective steps to improve or totally eradicate those things.

Full story at: Why You're Not Meeting Your Goals.