Some good thoughts from Laura Fenamore this morning…
“We all spend so much time thinking about our relationships with others that we forget our relationships to our own selves. Before we can find love without, we must find love within.
Self-love first, True Love second.
We ought to be our own best friends, but all too often we end up being our own worst critics. We develop a negative voice, the one that berates us when we mess up at work, the one that critiques our reflections as we pass by a store window. That voice is so present, so ubiquitous, we may not even realize that we don’t have to listen to it. With that little guy or gal talking in our ears, it’s no wonder so many of us have trouble walking the path of self-love.” Source; Turn Down Your Negative Voice – Turn Up Self-Love!
She goes on to say…
“And so I taught self-love to myself. Love, both of ourselves and others, isn’t just a sense of peace and bliss, though that is where it may end up eventually. At the beginning, it’s a deep sense of desire and drive. I’d like to share with you three inspirational practices I used as I learned to walk the path of heart.
1. Accept Who You Are Now
Accepting yourself, warts and all, puts you in charge of your destiny. On my own journey, I began to see that while my negative voice as a part of me – the wounded part of me – it was not me. I ultimately learned is that I never would escape negativity by ignoring it or making myself wrong for my feelings. I first had to accept that yes, I am depressed, but that is not who I am. It is simply where I am in this moment, whether that moment is an hour or a year.2. Affirm, Affirm, Affirm Again
Affirmations are a great way to work from the outside in – remind yourself how loveable you are, and eventually you’ll start believing it, too. Write yourself an affirmation.
• Make it about yourself – “I” statements only.
• Be positive – instead of “I don’t give up on my goals,” say “I stay focused on my goals.”
• Use the present tense – because you already are wonderful! Use the boldest, most positive phrasing you can muster.
• Be precise, be specific – list particular qualities about yourself that you love.
3. Quiet Your Negative Self-Talk
Negative self-talk takes many forms; it can be personally attacking thoughts (“You’re an idiot!”), complaints about your situation and the people in it (blaming others disempowers us), or silent judgments (“Is he/she better looking than I am?”). These thoughts reinforce our negative perceptions of ourselves and make it impossible for self-love to take hold. While we may not be able to turn off our negative voices, we can definitely turn them down.
Tune into that voice, and identify and write down seven negative thoughts you have about yourself in the next week. The next time you find yourself thinking that negative thought (“You screwed up this project!”), gently replace it with an affirmation.
Stick with it! Self-love is about being gentle and firm. Let go of the excuses and the stories about your lack of worth. Love requires us to stretch and to grow – not so that we may become someone worth loving (which we all already are), but rather so we can become someone who can love others and ourselvesgreatly and unconditionally.” Source; Turn Down Your Negative Voice – Turn Up Self-Love!
I hope this blesses you, too…
Bright, shiny objects! 