Tag: Psychotherapy

You are Responsible for You

More from Melody Beattie:

We can delegate tasks, but we can’t delegate responsibility, if the responsibility is really ours.

Sometimes, it’s normal to delegate tasks to other people. We may hire people to do certain things for us. We may engage in contracts with a therapist or a healer to help us work through a certain issue. But the responsibility for which pieces of advice we follow, and the decisions we make in our lives, ultimately belongs to us.

It’s easy to get lazy. We can let a friend, an employee, or even a skilled therapist begin making our decisions for us. We can listen to what they say and blindly take their advice. Then we don’t have to take responsibility for our lives. If the decision doesn’t work out, we can say, “You were wrong. Look at the mess you’ve gotten me into. I’m a victim, again.”

Yes you are. But you’re a victim of yourself.

We can listen to advice and let other people help us, but if they’re helping us do something that is our responsibility, the ultimate responsibility for the decision still belongs to us.

Get help when you need it. Delegate tasks. But don’t give away your power. Remember you can think, you can feel, you can take care of yourself, you can figure out your problems.

Don’t get lazy. Don’t give away responsibility for your life.

God, help me remember that I am responsible for me.

Source: April 17: You are Responsible for You | Language of Letting Go

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How to Be Your Own Therapist and Solve the More Manageable Problems in Your Life

Starting in the 1950s Carl Rogers brought Pers...
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Therapy is no doubt a helpful tool when you have problems to overcome, and one of the primary strategies therapists use to uncover and solve your issues involves identifying common behavioral patterns. But you don’t always need a therapist to recognize and correct an unhealthy pattern in your life. Here’s a primer for how you can solve the problems that don’t require professional help.

The world is good at creating patterns and we have an innate ability for picking them up. As we grow, our experience becomes a giant database of information and we make associations between similar events and occurrences as a way of understanding the world. While recognizing these patterns can be an incredibly helpful tool for solving our own issues, we’re much better at recognizing them in others than we are in ourselves. We also have a tendency to see patterns where we want to see them, even when they aren’t really there. We enlist the help of therapists because they’re trained to connect the behavioral dots, but with a little work we can hone our pattern recognition skills and solve many of our own problems. In this post we’ll give you a basic introduction to how pattern recognition works, how you can use it to investigate your issues, and what you need to watch our for so you don’t identify any patterns incorrectly.

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