Thinks I find along the way
Chris Brogan wrote this morning:
I think often about this: if _____ died, would I have said everything I want to say? I try to keep that answer “yes” all the time. So, if you live that way, you don’t have to worry about Father’s Day. It’s not some false holiday. It’s just a pointed highlight to a year long celebration. If we’re not thanking people for their amazing part in our lives all the time, then we’re missing an opportunity, aren’t we?
So true!
The title comes from Randy Taran who writes:
My father is requesting that all family members come by… no, not for a typical family reunion, but for Father’s Day. They say that people sometimes get a sense about things, and I have a feeling that my dad knows the end is near.
I am not complaining. I have had the amazing good fortune of having him around for longer than most. He is 95.5 and pretty darn present.
It has me thinking about the various roles we play in life: child, parent, parent to our inner child, parent becomes child, and child becomes parent’s parent… it’s endless in all the possible permutations.
I recently asked my dad for his five top life lessons, and this seems like a perfect time to share them:
1. Lead your own life. Know who you are and be true to yourself.
2. Be satisfied with what you have. Don’t go looking to other people for validation or compare yourself to others — that goes nowhere.
3. Be very grateful for what you have. Appreciate everything, from nature to relationships to waking up another day. Looking at things with the right perspective allows you to see that what you have is all you need, and more.
4. It’s all about family. That is what is important, that everyone is happy and lives a good life.
5. Love is what matters most. After all the ups and down that life sends our way, after all the careers and hopes and dreams, what stands out and will always remain is love.
This may or may not be his last Father’s Day; he has surprised us before. No matter what, I will always cherish my dad’s life lessons and pass them on to my own children as the cycle continues. Happy Father’s Day to all.
For more by Randy Taran, click here. For more on happiness, click here. via Randy Taran: Is This the Last Father’s Day?.
I curated this article for multiple reasons; not the least of which is that it makes me think about my father-in-law who is getting on in years. Throughout our marriage, my relationship with my in-laws has been strained for reasons too complicated to go into; only recently, however, I have gained a special appreciation for my father-in-law…
My ‘other Dad‘ is a recovering alcoholic who has been sober for almost 50 years. The more I dig into my own ’emotional sobriety’ and recovery from codependence, the more I appreciate him as a person and his contribution to the world — especially his example as he lives out the 12th step daily. Recently, when my wife was in Italy we connected a couple of times by phone and I had a chance to tell him for the first time that I loved him as a ‘dad’ — and I don’t say that lightly; dad is a title of honor in my life — and that I appreciate his example. There are things around ‘recovery’ that he gets that my first dad will never understand and I appreciate his testimony more with each passing day…
My second dad is now 79 and time is catching up with him. I cherish the help he has given me in my recovery and his lack of judgment toward me. Whether this is the last Father’s Day or the first of many we have in this ‘new’ relationship — God knows there are no guarantees in this life — I’m glad we had a chance to connect in his living years…
Every generation
Blames the one before
And all of their frustrations
Come beating on your door
I know that I’m a prisoner
To all my Father held so dear
I know that I’m a hostage
To all his hopes and fears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years
Crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thoughts
Stilted conversations
I’m afraid that’s all we’ve got
You say you just don’t see it
He says it’s perfect sense
You just can’t get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talkin’ in defense
Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It’s too late when we die
To admit we don’t see eye to eye
So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It’s the bitterness that lasts
So Don’t yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different date
And if you don’t give up, and don’t give in
You may just be O.K.
Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It’s too late when we die
To admit we don’t see eye to eye
I wasn’t there that morning
When my Father passed away
I didn’t get to tell him
All the things I had to say
I think I caught his spirit
Later that same year
I’m sure I heard his echo
In my baby’s new born tears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years
Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It’s too late when we die
To admit we don’t see eye to eye
Say it loud, say it clear
Say it loud
Don’t give up
Don’t give in
And don’t know what you can do next
You can have your Harry Chapin — I think this is the best song about fathers and sons there is…
Anderson Layman’s Blog via Take it slowly………………...
Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity. – Khalil Gibran
For all those 3 a.m. feedings, for that one extra book at bedtime, for all those words of encouragement, for watching Mickey Mouse sixteen times a day, for saying yes when mom said no, for letting us know everything’s gonna be okay.
Happy Father’s Day to all of you wonderful daddies out there.” via Happy Father’s Day « Positively Positive.
notsalmon via Positivity tip!.
See on Scoop.it – Codependency and recovery
The Truth About Gluten Allergies. There was a time when Amy Yoder Begley planned her runs around bathroom breaks. The professional runner and Olympian8217s problems started in high school.
See on www.livestrong.com
See on Scoop.it – Codependency and recovery
See on notsalmon.com
From one great curator to another; thanks for contributing to MY blog, plerudulier! :-D
See on Scoop.it – Videos worth viewing
Dr Paul Howard Jones assesses whether the latest scientific findings support popular fears about what technology is doing to us. Listen to the full audio: ht…
See on www.youtube.com
Thanks for contributing to my blog, Kristin! Always happy to see another post from you…
Thanks for contributing to my blog, Marie! :-D
The Meta Picture via Social Shower Curtain.
Holy Kaw! via We are family…all of us .
The Meta Picture via The Best Father’s Day Ad Ever Made.
The Meta Picture via No need to be better than others….
It seems like one of the major reasons people don’t like to workout is the amount of time it takes to do so. However, a new study in the Journal of Physiology suggests you might be able to get all the exercise you need in just 20 minutes if you’re willing to work at it.
We’ve talked briefly about interval training before, but this is one of the first studies to dig into if it actually works as a replacement for the usual recommendation of 30 minutes of continuous exercise. The idea is simple. You workout for one minute with strenuous activity and push your heart rate to about 90 percent of its maximum rate. You can get a rough estimate of your maximum heart rate by subtracting your age from 220. After the minute is up, you slow down and recover for one minute. You then repeat this 10 times for a total of 20 minutes (or 10 minutes of actual exercise). You can use this for running, cycling, swimming, or any number of cardiovascular workouts. (Note that this isn’t exactly the same as traditional high-intensity interval training, in which you push to 100 percent of your maximum heart rate.)
If you’re crunched for time and can’t get that full 30 minutes in, this is a great way to shorten the duration and still get in shape.” via 20 Minutes of Exercise a Day Is Enough to Get You Fit.
In Ephesians 3:14–15, Paul prays, “For this reason I bow my knees before the Father [patÄ“r], from whom every family [patria] in heaven and on earth is named.” In the Greek it is easy to pick up on Paul’s patÄ“r/patria play on words. John Stott chose to translate this phrase as “the Father from whom all fatherhood is named.” The ESV translation footnote makes a similar point.
God’s Fatherhood is the archetype of human fatherhood, a point made even more explicit in Hebrews 12:7–10. What that means for us fathers today is that we take our cues on fatherhood from the Father of Fatherhood, which is a great relief for any father today who was fathered by a sinful or absent father (which of course includes every one of us).
But what’s the point of this? In his most recent book, Douglas Wilson focuses one entire chapter (chapter 14) to a verse-by-verse stroll through the Gospel of John, highlighting every reference made to the Father/Son relationship. The book is worth its price for that chapter alone. At the end of his survey Wilson makes this summary observation:
The most obvious feature of the Father of Jesus Christ is His generosity. He is generous with His glory (John 1:14), with His tasks (John 5:18), with His protection (John 10:28–32), with His home (John 14:1–2), and with His joy (John 16:23–24). The Father gives (John 3:34–36). The Father gives His Son (John 3:16; 18:11); the Father gives His Spirit (John 14:16–17); the Father gives Himself (John 14:22–24).
Learning this about the Father who is a Spirit, who is intangible, should stir us deeply. He is seeking worshipers who will worship Him in Spirit and in truth — in short, who will become like He is. And what is He like? He is generous with everything. Is there anything He has that he has held back? And what should we — tangible fathers — be like? The question is terribly hard to answer, but not because it is difficult to understand. (Father Hunger, 204–205)
And that is a good challenge for me as a father because it makes me ask: from all the words that my children could use to describe me, would they choose generous? The answer spurs my attention to my Heavenly Father, the generous Father of all fatherhood.” via Learning Fatherhood From the Father of Fatherhood.
Bright, shiny objects! 
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