More ideas for my WordPress.com blogging friends…

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Out of ideas for your blog posts? Make them come to you using Google Alerts!

Google Alerts are email updates of the latest relevant Google results (web, news, etc.) based on your queries. Google Alerts – Monitor the Web for interesting new content

You’ll find a fine list of Google Alerts tutorials here

If you really want to take it up a notch, learn how to use Google Reader to create a virtual newspaper to track the sites and searches that interest you. I’ve written a free ebook on the topic of ‘personal news aggregation’ or ‘How to create your own personal news agency’. It’s free for registering at http://e1evation.com/pna/. Oh, and I started a new category called ‘blogging tips’ for you. If you want more, come follow me at http://e1evation.com

Questions? Feedback? Get on it! :-D

As I was eating lunch and reading the news in Feedly, the thought occured to me that I should share this with you!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sICTkKaKS0E

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Master your Gmail!

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If Gmail is so easy, why do people still have hundreds — thousands — of unread emails in their inboxes? In part it’s because technology without good thinking and tactics means nothing…

I teach my students that email should be for ‘just in time’ information — information that affects relationships and revenue. Everything else belongs in Google Reader! My friend Dana VanDen Heuvel of The Docking Station talked me into revealing my secrets for effective email handling at an event that happens next week. Here’s Dana’s press release…

“The Docking Station, Green Bay’s first Coworking space, is inviting business professionals to take back their Inbox and attend a free course on how to master Gmail to be more effective and efficient.

“An overwhelming inbox decreases efficiency and productivity,” said Dana VanDen Heuvel, co-owner of The Docking Station. “There are quick and easy solutions to manage your email and make it work for you. A lot of people dread opening their email. This course will help alleviate email stress and make your inbox about creating relationships and bringing in revenue.”

The Gmail course will be taught by Todd Lohenry, owner of e1evation, llc, an international consulting firm that has been educating and empowering business owners and professionals for the past 7 years. “I spent two hours with Todd that will save me at least a gazillion hours. His patient coaching and time-saving processes helped me get to an inbox of zero that same day,” said Carrie Klassen, Creative Director for Pink Elephant Academy for Entrepreneurs.

The Gmail course is part of a series of free events that The Docking Station hosts as part of their mission of being an educational resource to the entrepreneur community. “Our hope is to bring professionals together and connect them to thought leaders and resources that can help them increase productivity and grow their business,” said VanDen Heuvel.

The Docking Station is one of approximately three hundred Coworking spaces in the United States that is redefining the way independent professional work. It was founded by small business owners and entrepreneurs Dana VanDen Heuvel of The MarketingSavant Group and Peter Nugent of Enlighten Financial, LLC. The Docking Station is located at 111 S. Broadway in Downtown Green Bay. To register for the Gmail course, go to http://www.thedockingstation.net/events/ or for more information call The Docking Station at (920) 644-3625.”

If you can’t make it to Green Bay, try my ebook — you can find it online at http://elevation.company/pna. Just click the register link, provide a name and email address and you’ll be on your way to a more productive tomorrow…

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I had an interesting opportunity to sit on a panel of ‘experts’ yesterday and advise website development students on how they should develop a portfolio of their work and present it to prospective hiring authorities or clients. To be honest, I don’t know how I got on the panel; the others were truly experts — I’m just a lowly WordPress developer who creates websites out of necessity because of their role in ‘thought leadership’ marketing…

As I thought about it in hindsight there’s an important piece of advice that I left out but it’s a good one for all of us. When it comes to displaying a ‘portfolio’ [btw, to me a blog is a kind of a portfolio of thoughts so bear with me] of your life’s work I think there are only two activities that matter:

  • Deepening your understanding of your craft [or continuous ongoing education]
  • Letting people know you have deepened your understanding of your craft

I think all of ‘thought leadership’ marketing can be summed up in this statement: become and be known as the expert.

In order to do this you need a system that will help you effectively manage the content you need to master in order to become an actual expert. I wrote just last week about the tools I use to accomplish this. They are:

As it applies to this particular topic, the two most important tools in this process are Google Reader and Gist. Google Reader allows me to create a virtual newspaper of the sites and searches that I need to track in order to stay on top of my craft — my areas of ‘subject matter expertise’. Gist is like Google Reader but for people and companies. In an easy to use dashboard I can see everything that someone has produced on the internet for the past 24 hours so I never miss a thing that someone who is important to me has said. The two go together like peanut butter and chocolate to help me become more of an expert…

Getting smarter is only half the battle — letting the world know you have gotten smarter is the other part. Blogging and social media are perfect for this! As Chris Brogan said in Trust AgentsAs you now know, if you have no Google results, in a sense you don’t exist.” Active blogging on your area of expertise is a great way to let the world know you are an expert. Does it work? Well, are you reading this? Sharing your ideas in a public forum like the internet gets you a share of the voice which may get you share of mind if your ideas are good enough and may eventually lead to share of market. My tools of choice for getting found are:

  • WordPress
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn
  • Facebook
  • Google+

The order here is intentional and they tools are stack ranked in order of priority. Master one and move on to the next.I’ve written often about homebases and outposts — blogging should be the first priority because it is OWNED media — everything else should be evaluated based on the audience you’re trying to reach. Here in Northeast Wisconsin, LinkedIn rules — things might be different in your world…

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http://storify.com/e1evation/this-week-in-blogging-at-e1evation

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An editorial focus and calendar that reinforces it may be the single most important thing you can do if you want to blog for thought leadership. In his ground breaking book ‘Brand Stand’, Craig Badings writes…

The more research you do on the topic [on which you choose to focus] the more you will understand the space you want to enter. Ask yourself: Who is already playing in that space? What they are saying? Are they achieving cut through? Does our company have substantially more to say or something unique to offer in that space or not? Your deciding question should be ‘Can we own that space?’ If you cannot own a space my advice would be do not go there.

Badings, Craig (2009-07-08). BRAND STAND (Kindle Locations 790-794). BookPal. Kindle Edition.

If you have decided you can ‘own the space’, here is an overly simplified formula for achieving alignment in your content marketing strategy and getting ownership:

  • Brainstorm around your unique offerings in the space. Ask yourself “what are the problems my clients expect me to solve and how do I solve them in a unique way?”
  • Use Google’s keyword tools to research keywords around those unique offerings
  • Track trusted sites and keyword searches in Google Reader; read primarily those things that deepen your expertise in your unique offerings without losing the context of the whole space
  • Only curate or create content on your blog related to that unique offering
  • Leverage social media, etc. to amplify your content
  • Connect effectively with the readers you draw in

If you do those things in that order, you will have alignment around solving your customer problems and you will be found when people are looking for your solution[s]. In order to effectively cover my space, for example, which is content management and marketing for thought leadership, I track the topics content management, content marketing and ‘thought leadership’ marketing as well as the following tools:

  • Blogging
  • Facebook
  • Google+
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • and supporting tools like Google Reader, Shareaholic, Storify, etc.

Thursday, for example, is Twitter day. Every Thursday I reflect on Twitter as part of a balanced content management and marketing for thought leadership strategy and ‘storify’ a summary of the best articles from the previous week. This tactical approach ‘forces’ me to not only review the best content from the previous week in Google Reader and Twitter, but be sure to cover it in my blog.

Questions? Feedback? Comment below or use the connect form. In the meantime, here’s a summary of the best of what I found in content marketing, LinkedIn and Twitter this past week…

http://storify.com/e1evation/content-marketing-linkedin-and-twitter-for-2-17-20

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I haven’t done a screencast for awhile, so here’s a quick riff on Getting Things Done [GTD] in Gmail with Google Tasks…

Effectively managing email is fundamental. So many people are at the mercy of their inboxes! Ethan Waldman had a great post this morning over at The Minimalists that got me thinking about my own minimalit approach to Gmail. I hope he doesn’t mind if I curate a chunk of his thoughts here:

In everyday life, we hear the phrase “less is more” so often that it’s become cliché. But the number of people who actually live a “less is more” lifestyle are few and far between. Of course, when it comes to paring down, some areas of our lives are a lot easier to address than others. Getting rid of the majority of your possessions is difficult due to the emotional connections we have with our things.

There’s one area that I think is relatively untapped, in which adopting a more minimalist mentality isn’t too difficult, and offers huge gains in the form of time savings,and stress reduction.

That area? Email.

Think about it: For most of us, our email inboxes are the epicenter of our lives. Personal and professional communication all mixed up in a stew of disorganization.

The newest things are on top. Older things are pushed to the bottom or onto the next page, with no regard for importance. Most are things that don’t require immediate action—things we could read later, file for reference, or delete right off the bat.

Before I addressed this problem in my own life, the volume of email I received created the perfect opportunity to procrastinate. I could avoid responding to the more important messages by cleaning up and moving around the unimportant ones.

The task of maintaining my inbox took precedence over actually taking action, as critical items would get pushed down the page and I would deal with the junk that just kept flowing in on top. This task was complicated by the fact that I had both personal and professional emails all flowing into the same place with no system for determining which was which.

The solution to my problem only came after I realized that I didn’t need any other product, app, or gadget to solve it. The tools that I needed were already built into the mail program I use (Gmail), and I only needed to learn how to use them to create a better system.

The basis of my system is what Gmail refers to as filters. A filter is a set of actions that you tell Gmail to enact when it finds a message that matches specific criteria. If you get a message like X, do Y to it. Simple, but powerful.

Over the course of years of experimenting and trying things out, I developed a system that keeps my inbox automatically rganized.

The changes I’ve experienced as a result have been what you might expect: Of the time I spend dealing with email, I spend the majority of it writing or responding to important messages. I spend a small fraction of it actually organizing or finding the important things. They are automatically called out and highlighted before I ever open my inbox.

Gmail is by far the most popular mail service out there, but do you think that most people using it have created a system that organizes their email? Doubtful.

What’s holding you back? Just like getting rid of your possessions, deciding what email is important and what email isn’t forces you to choose. You do have to let go of certain things and decide they are less critical than others. It’s this process of letting go that people often have trouble with.

Some of the things I ultimately decided I could let go were all social media email notifications, nearly all email newsletters, all “deal” or coupon notifications, and all message board notification.  This list may be a starting point for you—the point is that every person must decide for themselves what they are willing to forgo seeing “at the top” of their inbox, in order to gain more clarity and focus on what they define as important.

But where to begin? Focus on what’s important. Create a folder or just use the star in Gmail to start collecting samples of messages that you find are important. Do this over the course of 1 or 2 weeks, and you will soon have a good sampling of what should be high priority in your inbox. Now you can look through them and determine how you’ll teach Gmail to treat the message. Is it from a specific person? Certain domain? Specific subject? Does it have an attachment?

These are all criteria that can be used when you create your filters and teach your inbox to organize itself.

I’m sure you know someone who keeps every single message in their inbox. They never move things into folders, they never delete anything. They never organize. And they defend their system—they don’t want to change because they see no need to. They are happy living with an overflowing email inbox, just like other people are happy living in a house stuffed to the gills with things they never use, or a smartphone overflowing with apps.

In my own life, I’ve found that my inbox minimalism rippled into my business and personal live. The time it took me to respond to important things decreased, and everybody was happier as a result. Less email, truly became more time.

At the end of the day, the choice is yours on what, if anything, you decide to implement. I promise positive effects of your efforts will be felt in and outside your email inbox.

Source: The Minimalists | Inbox Minimalism

 

I have written about this topic in my online ebook ‘personal news aggregation’ which is available [free registration required] at http://personalnewsaggregation.com. I talk about using Gmail and Google Reader to manage just in time vs. just in case information and I think it can rock your world like it did mine…

In the meantime, here’s a little riff I did this morning on using Gmail and Google Tasks as part of a balanced ‘Getting Things Done’ routine:

http://youtu.be/RGRXJqllbE4

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Happy Monday! Time to talk about trends in blogging and content marketing. First, though, a confession. I accidentally used decaf instead of regular and I’ve been dragging my butt around all day. This blog is fueled by coffee and now that I’ve had a good cup, life can start [at 3:27PM]!

Here’s my bias; blogging is a fundamental component of a successful content marketing campaign. I haven’t bought into the ‘siteless web’ model yet — I believe that a blog is the foundation of a successful online presence and I use a ‘homebase and outpost’ or ‘hub and spoke’ model for content marketing that I first heard articulated by Chris Brogan and Darren Rowse a few years ago.

There are three reasons that strike me as being important at the moment:

  • You own your blog — you don’t own Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn or Twitter
  • They are inexpensive and easy to update
  • According to HubSpot, active business blogs get 7x more traffic than static websites

These all sound like great reasons to me! If you need someone who is smart and beautiful, however, to tell you the same thing in more detail I highly recommend content marketing genius Heidi Cohen. Heidi had an epic post last week called Blogging Is Dead – Long Live The Blog!. In it she said…

“Call me a contrarian but blogs should be a core aspect of any organization’s marketing strategy regardless of whether you’re a B2C, B2B, not-for-profit or a solopreneur.” Source: Blogging Is Dead – Long Live The Blog! [Research] | Heidi Cohen

I soooo recommend you go to the source and read her article in toto. People usually turn to me after reading an article like this and saying to themselves “Makes perfect sense. Where do I get started?” You see, I’m not a content marketing expert like Heidi — I just tell people how to implement what she advocates. I can help you create a successful blog that is the focal point of your content marketing campaign…

Here are some great articles I read this past week about blogging and content marketin trends:

http://storify.com/e1evation/blogging-and-content-management-trends-for-this-we

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I’ve hit the Twitter wall! Apparently my ‘twitter ho‘ [warning! link NSFW] strategy of follow everyone is tragically flawed…

According to Twitter…

“We do not limit the number of people who can follow you, but we have put limits on how many other accounts you can follow. Every account can follow 2,000 users total. Once you’ve followed 2,000 users, there are limits to the number of additional users you can follow. This number is different for each account and is based on your ratio of followers to following; this ratio is not published. Follow limits cannot be lifted by Twitter and everyone is subject to follow limits, even high profile and API accounts.” Source: Twitter Help Center | I Can’t Follow People – Follow Limits

I have been using a cool new app called SocialBro [I don’t make these names up — I just report them] to aggressively follow more people. Even I didn’t realize there was a limit. Until now. I’ll have to consult with the great Twitter oracles in my network @tommytrc and @mmangen to see where I went wrong. This social media stuff can be tricky — even for an instructor that supposed to know it all [remember, all is a lot to know!]. I’ll report back on what I learn next Thursday — twitterday @ e1evation!

In the meantime, if you’re interested in Twitter trends, you might like this screencast I did a few weeks back on how I’m using Getting Things Done [GTD] principles for content marketing. Twitter has become an even more critical part of my social media strategy because of the way I use it now…

Here’s the roundup of the best Twitter articles I read in the past week…

http://storify.com/e1evation/twitter-roundup-for-2-9-2012

Google Talk

Google. Sigh…

By now, most people have heard that the Google motto is ‘don’t be evil‘. Current trends in social media indicate that many are wondering whether or not Google has forgotten that mantra and took a left turn somewhere in 2011. Even I, the Google fan boy that I am, must admit that some of Google’s recent changes — like the ones made to Google Reader on November 1, 2011 — have left a sour taste in my mouth…

Still, as a social media instructor at Northeast Wisconsin Technical College, I fought hard to have a Google class added to the social media curriculum. Why? The value of Google’s ‘free’ tools is so great that I think it’s foolish NOT to use them despite the hidden cost. All of life is about trade-offs and compromises. Although I may have sold my soul to Google long ago, my students still have a choice…

I firmly believe that Google has two of the three most powerful tools for the collection phase of content management; Gmail and Google Reader. I firmly believe I would not be who I am doing what I am doing without those two tools. Gmail allows me to effectively handle my ‘just in time’ content while Google Reader helps me handle my ‘just in case’ content. They go together like peanut butter and chocolate to help me manage the content I need to be a thought leader in my space…

Per usual, here’s a collection of the best Google articles I’ve found this past week. Enjoy!!!

http://storify.com/e1evation/this-week-in-google-at-e1evation

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Twitter has not always been a starting player in my content management and content marketing lineup — in fact, for a long time I must confess I neglected Twitter. Oddly enough, it was Google’s changes to Google Reader and privacy issues with Facebook and Google that made me rethink my content management and content marketing strategy…

When I started to think about the fact that Twitter is pretty much ubiquitous — one of my favorite college words for ‘everywhere’ — I rethought Twitter’s role in my content management and content marketing world. I had a big of a revelation a couple of weeks ago as to how Twitter could play a central role in my content marketing strategy — you can view it here. Now I’ve gone from neglecting Twitter — thinking of it just as one of the bases I have to cover — to giving it a starring role!

I used Twitter in concert with Shareaholicone of my ‘must use’ tools — in fact, I call it the ‘Swiss Army knife’ of social media. Thanks to Shareaholic I’m always ready to send any good thing I stumble upon to my Twitter account via HootSuite. Why via HootSuite? Well, there are a lot of reasons why I use HootSuite and I should go into that again sometime. In this case, though the reason is that HootSuite gives me great analytics on how my tweets are doing.

If you want to focus on Twitter for content management and content marketing like I do, try adding Shareaholic and HootSuite to your mix!

Here’s a summary of great Twitter articles I read this past week via @Storify…

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I summarize the top Twitter news every Thursday at this time…

http://storify.com/e1evation/trending-topics-in-twitter-for-this-week-on-2-2-20&#8243; target=”_blank”>View the story “Trending topics in Twitter for this week on 2/2/2012” on Storify]

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Google, Gmail, Google Reader, and now Google+ are all a vital part of a content management and marketing for thought leadership system. I use Gmail and Google Reader for content management and Google+ for content marketing. Gmail, and it’s business version Google Apps for Business, are critical for managing what I call ‘just in time’ information — information that affects relationships and revenue. Google Reader is what I use to handle ‘just in case’ information like news and industry trends. Applying this approach to your content management will go a long way toward lightening the load in your inbox, but Gmail features like Priority Inbox, keyboard shortcuts, etc. give Gmail a clear advantage over other email systems, too. Google Reader allows users to create a virtual newspaper that delivers up to the minute reports on the things that are important to your world. Together these Google products are like the peanut butter and chocolate combination of content management. The cherry on top of the sundae is that these Google tools, like so many others, are available as excellent android apps as well!

The best thing about these products is that they are free, or have the appearance of free. Even with news like this report from Mashable, I still think these tools are a good value…

http://c.brightcove.com/services/viewer/federated_f9?isVid=1&isUI=1

Google+ is still an unknown variable in my content marketing world. I’m not happy with the way that Google is ‘forcing’ me to use it whether I want to or not, but I am gradually starting to use it as part of my content marketing plan. Sometimes I’m grateful that my social media certification course at Northeast Wisconsin Technical College forces me to be familiar with all these tools! btw, Google Reader is what I consider to be a ‘secret weapon’ for my work. I’ve done several posts on it — here’s a link to a series I did on getting content into and out of Google Reader that you might enjoy…

In the meantime, here’s a collection of the best content I’ve read on Gmail, Google Reader and Google+ in the past week:

[View the story “Trending topics in Google for this week” on Storify]

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My readers know well my passion for Google Reader and the power it brings to content management. Last week I cracked the code on autoposting to Twitter with the help of ifft.com and I’ve prepped a Google Reader tips and tricks video that I’ll share with you later in the post. First, though, here’s something that made me smile…

Devon Heaton of Servant of Chaos made my day with his post on how social media mechanics like me are on the rise…

You need an individual uniquely suited to “getting s#@t done. You need the Social Media Mechanic.

This is the person who can implement your strategy, find the right bits and pieces and bolt them together. This person will know what needs to be done to make the right things work – and sometimes even do the wrong things (let’s face it, we’re still making mistakes and learning from them, right?).

But without the Social Media Mechanic, you’re just going to be left with a whole heap of unconnected parts. So once you’ve got your continuous digital strategy underway, start seeking your Social Media Mechanic. You’ll never get out of the trough of disillusion without one!

Source: The Rise of the Social Media Mechanic – Servant of Chaos

I have always referred to myself as an internet ‘plumber’ much to the chagrin of @lisenbury who pleaded with me to use the phrase internet ‘electrician’. For some reason, that didn’t suit me but social media mechanic fits just fine! So, if you’re looking for a social media mechanic, look no further…

As proof of my worthiness, I offer this ‘riff’ on Google Reader for content management. Google Reader is the most important tool in my content management workflow and here are just a few tips for using it well;

http://youtu.be/BM2ve8c4fR0

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The highlights of my week included a couple of convos on blogging and Search Engine Optimization [SEO] with a brilliant guy named Ronnie Bincer that have my head spinning with the possibilities and cracking the code on autopublishing from Google Reader with the help of a tool called ‘If this then that’ or ifttt.com

Using ifttt, I can direct content to several places at one simply by starring it or tagging it. This has great implications for my ‘content marketing for thought leadership’ workflow because it makes it easier for thought leaders to go from consuming content to producing content. I’ll have to so a screencast next week to show you what I’m talking about…

Here’s the wrap up…<script src="

The things I think I learned this week…

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The things I think I learned this week…

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http://storify.com/e1evation/my-week-in-review-for-1-28-2012&#8243; target=”_blank”>View the story “My week in review for 1/28/2012” on Storify]Questions? Feedback?

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The power of signatures in email and tools for taking notes…

The power of signatures in email and tools for taking notes…

http://storify.com/e1evation/tips-for-thursday-on-1-26-2012

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An Incomplete List Of Things To Do Daily, To Be Happy and Healthy

Gretchen RubinOne of my new favorite blogs is ‘The Happiness Project’ hosted by Gretchen Rubin. Yesterday she shared this…

I’ve just started trying to come up with a list of the bare minimum of things we should do every day to be happy and healthy.

This list doesn’t include major challenges, like “Quit smoking.” Obviously, quitting smoking is very important for health, but it’s not easy to add to a to-do list. This list doesn’t include items like “Spend less time on the internet” or “Read more” because they aren’t universal enough. This list also doesn’t include items related to attitude: gratitude, cheerfulness, and the like. These are very concrete, very essential things to do as part of the everyday routine.

Here’s what I’ve come up with so far…
Wear your seat belt
Take prescriptions medications properly
Go for a ten-minute walk (preferably outside)
Put your keys and wallet away in the same place
Take something with you (for instance, drop your dirty socks in the hamper on your way from your bedroom to the kitchen)
Charge your phone
Connect with someone close to you
Go to bed in time to get a good night’s sleep

As less crucial, but also highly advisable…
Make your bed
Kiss every member of your family
Sign the organ donor registry or tell your family you’d want to be a donor

What else would you add? I know I’m missing many items.

Source: The Happiness Project: An Incomplete List Of Things To Do Daily, To Be Happy and Healthy.

I’d suggest you add her site to Google Reader and follow her every day! But only if you want to be happy…

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More good thoughts from Heidi Cohen

Social media is like a hungry teenage boy. As any parent will tell you, when it comes to food, they’re never satisfied. Similarly, social media has a voracious appetite requiring continual feeding in the form of content and communications in a variety of formats.

What’s a marketer to do keep your social media initiatives sated? Here are seven tips to develop appropriate content and engagement to nourish the social media beast, regardless of which platforms you use.

Source: How To Feed The Social Media Beast | Heidi Cohen

Go to the source if you want to learn more about how Heidi feeds the beast. Me? I use Google Reader to search for content that is in alignment with my brand and my blog so that I curate or create content that is in alignment with my customer value demands. Comment, call or ‘connect’ so we can talk about how this applies to you and your organization…

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The problem isn’t writer’s block…

…it’s actually writing the damn post.

You don’t need ideas, open Google Reader or join #Blogchat.  You’ll have enough ideas to write posts for the next year.

The problem is, when you actually WRITE the post, then it’s real.  Then you are dangerously close to publishing it.  Which means suddenly everyone will see it, and read it, and judge it.

And yet, you are often the harshest judge of your own work.  Too often, you assume that your post isn’t worthy of the reader, before they have a chance to dismiss it.  So it stays in your Draft folder, mocking you.

You can’t ‘sell’ until you ‘ship’.

Source: Stop Lying to Yourself, Your Problem Isn’t Figuring Out What to Write About… | MackCollier.com – Social Media Training and Consulting

Go to the source if you’d like to read the rest of Mack’s article. Or, maybe you should just start writing!

:-D

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It’s not you, it’s me: How family karma shapes your relationship

My favorite ‘healthy’ blog of the week is called ‘Loving with Power’ and it’s hosted by my client Michele Lisenbury Christensen. Ah, you say, client! This is just another developer promoting his work. Actually, no – I helped Michele get a grip on her email and although I’m a web developer I had nothing to do with this masterpiece…

Do you ever get the feeling your partner is relating more to someone from her past – say, his mom or her big brother – than to you?  Like you do something and the reaction is out of proportion or out of sync with what you did, as if some old junk is getting triggered?  The good news is, you’re probably right – it’s more about then, and less about now.  The harder to take news?

You do it too, baby.

We’re all reacting to our families every day, even when we think it’s our partner’s actions, words, and presence we’re responding to.

“But I had a nice family!” you say.

Me, too, in so very many ways.  But whomever you grew up among, I believe you came to this planet and picked a situation to help you work on some of the rough edges in your soul, so your family doesn’t have to be drama central or a source of misery to give you “karma” or fodder for development.  They just remind you of what you came here to learn.  As does your current partner, no?

The 3 ways we make sure our karma gets triggered:

– We attract people who let us recreate these dramas
– We elicit behavior from those we’re with that, once again, makes us feel the way we hate feeling but that’s familiar
– We interpret/distort WHATEVER they do, even if it bears no resemblance, as being more of the same

And I’ll be damned if it isn’t reallllllllly compelling to think, when I’m upset with my partner Kurt, that this is a cut-and-dried issue of his, or between us… but surely NOT a dance elegantly orchestrated by my karma so as to help me wake up!  So if you find this karma junk really off-pissing, please know that I feel ya, and agree, and lovingly reiterate: it’s yours.  And it’ll persist till you open its gifts.

Do you really want it gone?

Over time, we can increase our awareness of how this “family karma” shapes our view of our partner, but we’re probably not going to get rid of it 100%.  It’s too rich a territory to utterly eradicate.  What would be the fun in that?  Eric Klein of wisdomheart.org says “the aim is to be in relationship 80% with your partner and only 20% with your past.”  I can hang with 80%, can’t you? We came to this life to heal this stuff, work it out, and release it so we don’t have to spend future lifetimes lamenting it, but staying with the process feels more important (and possible!) to me than getting it “perfect.”

Source: It’s not you, it’s me: How family karma shapes your relationship – Loving With Power

I strongly suggest you follow Michele and put her in Google Reader like I did…

Give the gift of connection and relationship

Pile of gorgeous gifts
Image via Wikipedia

I found another great blogger this morning — Lee Horbachewski of SimpLee Serene. Here’s a recent post I liked…

No matter who you are, what you look like, what you do, where you invest your time or how you celebrate the season, you need connection.

  • Accepting people for who they are.
  • Knowing what’s going on around you.
  • Being present right now.
  • Connecting with full attention and pure intention.

It all sounds wonderful doesn’t it?  So what stops our society from doing and being this?

Busy, busy, busy, go, go, go, buy, buy, buy and dare I say it judge, judge, judge…

What if the biggest gift you can give someone you love is you: your time, your love and your acceptance?

I invite you to consider for a moment what it would feel like to experience quality time with a friend.   How would it feel to receive a surprise visit, a phone call, a real life connection?

I invite you to press STOP right now on the busyness of life and what should be done.  Connect with YOU in this moment, now think of the special people in your life…  Do you know how they are feeling?  Do you know what’s going on in their life?  When was the last time you spoke to them?  When was the last time you saw them?

Show someone you love, that they are special.

Show someone you care, and give the gift of connection and relationship.

And as always this begins with connecting with YOU.

Source: Give the gift of connection and relationship by Lee | SimpLee Serene

If you like this, there’s more at the Source. Add her blog to Google Reader like I did and keep your holidays happy…

Open-mouthed smile

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