Fun becomes fun, love becomes love, life becomes worth living. And we become grateful. —Beyond Codependency Wait, and expect good things—for yourself and your loved ones. When you wonder what is coming, tell yourself the best is coming, the very best life and love have to offer, the best God and His universe have to send. Then open your hands to receive it. Claim it, and it is yours. See the best in your mind; envision what it will look like, what it will feel like. Focus, until you can see it clearly. Let your whole being, body and soul, enter into and hold onto the image for a moment. Then, let it go. Come back into today, the present moment. Do not obsess. Do not become fearful. Become excited. Live today fully, expressing gratitude for all you have been, all you are, and all you will become. Wait, and expect good things. Today, when I think about the year ahead, I will focus on the good that is coming.
Back in 1723 Jonathan Edwards chartered a list of resolutions for his life. 70 of them. And he read them once a week.
Matt Perman writes:
[Edwards] shows us that a well lived life doesn’t just happen; it requires intentionality. And intentionality manifests itself in certain “mechanisms” that help us maintain our intentionality. Edwards’ resolutions are one example of such a “mechanism.”
So Edwards is a good example not just of a life that is lived well, but also of the “practical side” of how to actually build that intentionality into our lives, rather than just letting it remain a vague wish that never takes deep root and makes a real difference.
Refusing to be vague, Matt has organizedJonathan Edwards’s resolutions into seven specific categories. This approach is a fresh way to help us apply their wisdom where we live. The categories include:
Overall Life Mission
Good Works
Time Management
Relationships
Suffering
Character
Spiritual Life
The New Year is upon us. Read through Edwards’s resolutions. Print them out. Consider adopting them as your own for a Christ-exalting, God-entranced vision of all things.
Sometimes, the holidays are filled with the joy we associate with that time of year. The season flows. Magic is in the air. Sometimes, the holidays can be difficult and lonely. Here are some ideas I’ve learned through personal experience, and practice, to help us get through difficult holidays: Deal with feelings, but try not to dwell unduly on them. Put the holidays in perspective: A holiday is one day out of 365. We can get through any 24-hour period. Get through the day, but be aware that there may be a post-holiday backlash. Sometimes, if we use our survival behaviors to get through the day, the feelings will catch up to us the next day. Deal with them too. Get back on track as quickly as possible. Find and cherish the love that’s available, even if it’s not exactly what we want. Is there someone we can give love to and receive love from? Recovering friends? Is there a family who would enjoy sharing their holiday with us? Don’t be a martyr; go. There may be those who would appreciate our offer to share our day with them. We are not in the minority if we find ourselves experiencing a less-than-ideal holiday. How easy, but untrue, to tell ourselves the rest of the world is experiencing the perfect holiday, and we’re alone in conflict. We can create our own holiday agenda. Buy yourself a present. Find someone to whom you you can give. Unleash your loving, nurturing self and give in to the holiday spirit. Maybe past holidays haven’t been terrific. Maybe this year wasn’t terrific. But next year can be better, and the next a little better. Work toward a better life—one that meets your needs. Before long, you’ll have it.
God, help me enjoy and cherish this holiday. If my situation is less than ideal, help me take what’s good and let go of the rest.
I found another great blogger this morning — Lee Horbachewski of SimpLee Serene. Here’s a recent post I liked…
No matter who you are, what you look like, what you do, where you invest your time or how you celebrate the season, you need connection.
Accepting people for who they are.
Knowing what’s going on around you.
Being present right now.
Connecting with full attention and pure intention.
It all sounds wonderful doesn’t it? So what stops our society from doing and being this?
Busy, busy, busy, go, go, go, buy, buy, buy and dare I say it judge, judge, judge…
What if the biggest gift you can give someone you love is you: your time, your love and your acceptance?
I invite you to consider for a moment what it would feel like to experience quality time with a friend. How would it feel to receive a surprise visit, a phone call, a real life connection?
I invite you to press STOP right now on the busyness of life and what should be done. Connect with YOU in this moment, now think of the special people in your life… Do you know how they are feeling? Do you know what’s going on in their life? When was the last time you spoke to them? When was the last time you saw them?
Show someone you love, that they are special.
Show someone you care, and give the gift of connection and relationship.
And as always this begins with connecting with YOU.
Each day, ask God what God wants us to do today; then ask God to help. A simple request, but so profound and far-reaching it can take us anywhere we need to go. Listen: all that we want, all that we need, all the answers, all the help, all the good, all the love, all the healing, all the wisdom, all the fulfillment of desire is embodied in this simple request. We need say no more than Thank You. This Plan that has been made for us is not one of deprivation. It is one of fullness, joy, and abundance. Walk into it. See for yourself. Today, I will ask God to show me what God wants me to do for this day, and then ask for help to do that. I will trust that is sufficient to take me into light and joy.
“The following summarizes the description of the 11th Step provided in Alcoholics Anonymous (primarily on pp. 86-88). This is supplemented by some suggestions [in brackets] that we have found helpful.
Preparing for the Day Ahead
We ask God to direct our thinking, asking especially that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.
We consider our plans for the day. We can now use our mental faculties with assurance.
If we face indecision or we can’t determine what course to take, we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy.
We pray to be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of problems.
We ask especially for freedom from self-will. [We might also pray for help with specific defects or problem areas, and review our 10th step corrective measures for the day ahead.]
Prayers to be of Use
We ask for guidance in the way of patience, kindness, tolerance and love especially within the family.
We pray as to what we can do today for the person who is still sick. [We might also pray for specific people in need, or those with whom we’re angry.]
Spiritual/Religious Exercises
If appropriate, we attend to our religious devotions, or say set prayers which emphasize 12 Step principles.
We may read from a spiritual book.
Practicing the 11th Step Throughout the Day
We pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action.
We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.””
For the record, the first excerpt can be found in Melody Beattie‘s book “The Language of Letting Go”. I recommend getting the Kindle edition — it’s cheaper and you can view it on your computer, smartphone or Kindle. The second reading comes from Recovery.net which features a website and an android app…
If you had a rocky childhood, it doesn’t have to ruin your adulthood.
If you are in a career that doesn’t fulfill you, you can do something new.
If you are in a toxic relationship, you can change the rules or move on.
If you were in an unhealthy relationship in the past, it doesn’t mean your next relationship can’t be wonderful.
If you have lived in the same place forever, you can find new scenery that stimulates your growth.
If you have been overweight for most of your life, you can get healthy today.
If you are addicted to alcohol, drugs, food or anything else, you can seek help now.
Just because you have always done it one way doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it that way.
No matter what road you’re on, no matter how long you have been on it, no matter who you are traveling it with, it is never too late to change direction.
Looking back and wishing you could change history or have done something differently is a waste of energy. Keep moving forward.
…Beattie, that is. I really wish I would have stayed on top of my readings the past couple of days – it might have helped me avoid a lot of drama. At the risk of appearing to be a Melody Beattie fan boy, I’m going to share both of them as a reminder for me and a lesson [maybe] for you…
Letting Go: December 4 “How much do we need to let go of?” a friend asked one day. “I’m not certain,” I replied, “but maybe everything.” Letting go is a spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical process, a sometimes mysterious metaphysical process of releasing to God and the Universe that which we are clinging to so tightly. We let go of our grasp on people, outcomes, ideas, feelings, wants, needs, desires—everything. We let go of trying to control our progress in recovery. Yes, it’s important to acknowledge and accept what we want and what we want to happen. But it’s equally important to follow through by letting go. Letting go is the action part of faith. It is a behavior that gives God and the Universe permission to send us what we’re meant to have. Letting go means we acknowledge that hanging on so tightly isn’t helping to solve the problem, change the person, or get the outcome we desire. It isn’t helping us. In fact, we learn that hanging on often blocks us from getting what we want and need. Who are we to say that things aren’t happening exactly as they need to happen? There is magic in letting go. Sometimes we get what we want soon after we let go. Sometimes it takes longer. Sometimes the specific outcome we desire doesn’t happen. Something better does. Letting go sets us free and connects us to our Source. Letting go creates the optimum environment for the best possible outcomes and solutions. Today, I will relax. I will let go of that which is upsetting me the most. I will trust that by letting go, I have started the wheels in motion for things to work out in the best possible way.
Difficult People: December 5 Few things can make us feel crazier than expecting something from someone who has nothing to give. Few things can frustrate us more than trying to make a person someone he or she isn’t; we feel crazy when we try to pretend that person is someone he or she is not. We may have spent years negotiating with reality concerning particular people from our past and our present. We may have spent years trying to get someone to love us in a certain way, when that person cannot or will not. It is time to let it go. It is time to let him or her go. That doesn’t mean we can’t love that person anymore. It means that we will feel the immense relief that comes when we stop denying reality and begin accepting. We release that person to be who he or she actually is. We stop trying to make that person be someone he or she is not. We deal with our feelings and walk away from the destructive system. We learn to love and care differently in a way that takes reality into account. We enter into a relationship with that person on new terms—taking ourselves and our needs into account. If a person is addicted to alcohol, other drugs, misery, or other people, we let go of his or her addiction; we take our hands off it. We give his or her life back. And we, in the process, are given our life and freedom in return. We stop letting what we are not getting from that person control us. We take responsibility for our life. We go ahead with the process of loving and taking care of ourselves. We decide how we want to interact with that person, taking reality and our own best interests into account. We get angry, we feel hurt, but we land in a place of forgiveness. We set him or her free, and we become set free from bondage. This is the heart of detaching in love. Today, I will work at detaching in love from troublesome people in my life. I will strive to accept reality in my relationships. I will give myself permission to take care of myself in my relationships, with emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual freedom for both people as my goal.
Learning to be a healthy giver can be a challenge. Many of us got caught up in compulsive giving charitable acts motivated by uncharitable feelings of guilt, shame, obligation, pity, and moral superiority.
We now understand that caretaking and compulsive giving don’t work. They backfire. Caretaking keeps us feeling victimized.
Many of us gave too much, thinking we were doing things right; then we became confused because our life and relationships weren’t working. Many of us gave so much for so long, thinking we were doing God’s will; then in recovery, we refused to give, care, or love for a time.
That’s okay. Perhaps we needed a rest. But healthy giving is part of healthy living. The goal in recovery is balance caring that is motivated by a true desire to give, with an underlying attitude of respect for ourselves and others. The goal in recovery is to choose what we want to give, to whom, when, and how much. The goal in recovery is to give, and not feel victimized by our giving.
Are we giving because we want to, because it’s our responsibility? Or are we giving because we feel obligated, guilty, ashamed, or superior? Are we giving because we feel afraid to say no? Are the ways we try to assist people helpful, or do they prevent others from facing their true responsibilities? Are we giving so that people will like us or feel obligated to us? Are we giving to prove we’re worthy? Or are we giving because we want to give and it feels right?
Recovery includes a cycle of giving and receiving. It keeps healthy energy flowing among us, our Higher Power, and others. It takes time to learn how to give in healthy ways. It takes time to learn to receive. Be patient. Balance will come.
I gave because I expected something in return; I wanted people to think I’m brilliant and to be eternally indebted to me when I helped them. It didn’t work. I’m getting healthier now…
“We are the greatest thing that will ever happen to us. Believe It. It makes life much easier.” – Codependent No More
It is time to stop this nonsense of running around picking on ourselves. We may have walked through much of our life apologizing for ourselves either directly or indirectly feeling less valuable than others, believing that they know better than we do, and believing that somehow others are meant to be here and we are not. We have a right to be here. We have a right to be ourselves. We are here. There is a purpose, a reason, and an intention for our life. We do not have to apologize for being here or being who we are. We are good enough, and deserving. Others do not have our magic. We have our magic. It is in us. It doesn’t matter what we’ve done in our past. We all have a past, woven with mistakes, successes, and learning experiences. We have a right to our past. It is ours. It has worked to shape and form us. As we progress on this journey, we shall see how each of our experiences will be turned around and used for good. We have already spent too much time being ashamed, being apologetic, and doubting the beauty of ourselves. Be done with it. Let it go. It is an unnecessary burden. Others have rights, but so do we. We are neither less than nor more than. We are equal. We are who we are. That is who we were created and intended to be. That, my friend, is a wonderful gift. God, help me own my power to love and appreciate myself. Help me give myself validity instead of looking to others to do that.” Source; November 29: Appreciating Ourselves | Language of Letting Go
These words should not be as important to me as they are, but they are! Hey, relatives — you know who you are: “Others have rights, but so do we. We are neither less than nor more than. We are equal. We are who we are. That is who we were created and intended to be.” This holiday season will be the best in a long time because I’m giving myself permission not to play a role in their drama or buy into their bullsh!t…
“The thought and feeling of gratitude are among the most powerful tools of creation. Thinking about the things in your life that you are grateful for having not only makes you appreciate them more – it also sends out a message of “have” versus “lack” into the Universe. And since you attract what you are, you activate the mechanism that allows you to have that which you desire and are thankful for. Gratitude is most powerful when followed by action – when thought and deed are aligned – so showing your gratitude brings even more of this ‘have’ energy to you. Thinking, feeling, and acting thankful every day doesn’t take much – just awareness of what you’re already doing and connecting these to the thought and feeling of gratitude. Here are some examples:
I’m grateful for my fully functioning body, and I show it by walking in joy.
I’m grateful for my creativity, and I show it by coming up with new recipes in the kitchen.
I’m grateful for my family, and I show it by telling them that I love them whenever I can.
I’m grateful for this beautiful planet and I show it by recycling.
I’m thankful for my desire to help others, and I show it by sharing valuable information for a healthy lifestyle.
I’m thankful for my need to be who I am and say what I think, and I show it by “telling it like it is” and speaking/writing/standing for the bottom line.
I’m thankful for the sun, and I show it by closing my eyes and feeling the sun’s rays for a second every morning that I open my curtains to a clear day.
I’m thankful for knowing that I am connected to every single soul on this planet and beyond, and I show it by smiling at everyone I meet and treating them with the Golden Rule: do unto others as you would have done unto you.
As you can see, you can practice gratefulness with the smallest thing or the most profound ideas. I challenge you to, right now, think of something or someone for which you are thankful, and show it. Share it with us here too, because nothing spreads the joy and power of gratitude like sharing it with others. What are you grateful for?” Source: Silvie+Maryl | Upgrading Minds, Transforming Lives
“Just for today I will not be afraid of anything. If my mind is clouded with nameless dreads, I will track them down and expose their unreality. I will remind myself that God is in charge of me and mine and that I have only to accept the protection and guidance. What happened yesterday need not trouble me today.
This is a brand new shining day and I have it in my power to make it a good one just by the way I think about it and what I do with it.”
The following is from Melody Beattie’s ‘The Language of Letting Go’…
“I sat in the car, looking at the sign on the door of the food shelf office: “Closed until Friday.” It was Wednesday. I had two hungry children and myself; I had no money. I laid my head on the steering wheel. I couldn’t take it anymore. I had been so strong, so brave, so trusting for so long. I was a single parent with two children, recently divorced. I had worked so courageously at being grateful for what I had, while setting financial goals and working at believing I deserved the best. I had put up with so much poverty, so much deprivation. Daily, I worked the Eleventh Step. I worked so hard at praying for knowledge of God’s will for me only, and the power to carry it through. I believed I was doing what I needed to do in my life. I wasn’t lollygagging. I was doing my best, working my hardest. And there just wasn’t enough money. Life had been a struggle in many ways, but the financial struggle seemed endless. Money isn’t everything, but it takes money to solve certain problems. I was sick of “letting go” and “letting go” and “letting go.” I was sick of “acting as if” I had enough money. I was tired of having to work so hard daily at letting go of the pain and fear about not having enough. I was tired of working so hard at being happy without having enough. Actually, most of the time I was happy. I had found my soul in poverty. But now that I had my soul and my self, I wanted some money too. While I sat in the car trying to compose myself, I heard God speak to me in that silent, still voice that whispers gently to our souls. “You don’t ever have to worry about money again, child. Not unless you want to. I told you that I would take care of you. And I will.” Great, I thought. Thanks a lot. I believe you. I trust you. But look around. I have no money. I have no food. And the food shelf is closed. You’ve let me down. Again I heard His voice in my soul: “You don’t have to worry about money again. You don’t have to be afraid. I promised to meet all your needs.” I went home, called a friend, and asked to borrow some money. I hated borrowing, but I had no choice. My breakdown in the car was a release, but it didn’t solve a thing—that day. There was no check in the mailbox. But I got food for the day. And the next day. And the next. Within six months, my income doubled. Within nine months, it tripled. Since that day, I have had hard times, but I have never had to go without—not for more than a moment in time. Now, I have enough. Sometimes I still worry about money because that seems to be habitual. But now I know I don’t have to, and I know I never did. God, help me work hard at what I believe is right for me in my life today, and I’ll trust You for the rest. Help me let go of my fears about money. Help me turn that area over to You, God. Take away the blocks and barriers in my life to financial success.”
Beattie, Melody (2009-12-15). The Language of Letting Go (Hazelden Meditation Series) (pp. 336-337). Hazelden. Kindle Edition.
“The belief that life has to be hard and difficult is the belief that makes a martyr. We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves. We aren’t helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power—not to change or control others, but to solve the problems that are ours to solve. Using each problem that comes our way to “prove” that life is hard and we are helpless—this is codependency. It’s the victim trap. Life does not have to be difficult. In fact, it can be smooth. Life is good. We don’t have to “awfulize” it, or ourselves. We don’t have to live on the underside. We do have power, more power than we know, even in the difficult times. And the difficult times don’t prove life is bad; they are part of the ups and downs of life; often, they work out for the best. We can change our attitude; we can change ourselves; sometimes, we can change our circumstances. Life is challenging. Sometimes, there’s more pain than we asked for; sometimes, there’s more joy than we imagined. It’s all part of the package, and the package is good. We are not victims of life. We can learn to remove ourselves as victims of life. By letting go of our belief that life has to be hard and difficult, we make our life much easier. Today, God, help me let go of my belief that life is so hard, so awful, or so difficult. Help me replace that belief with a healthier, more realistic view.”
Beattie, Melody (2009-12-15). The Language of Letting Go (Hazelden Meditation Series) (pp. 331-332). Hazelden. Kindle Edition.
“Anxiety is often our first reaction to conflict, problems, or even our own fears. In those moments, detaching and getting peaceful may seem disloyal or apathetic. We think: If I really care, I’ll worry; if this is really important to me, I must stay upset. We convince ourselves that outcomes will be positively affected by the amount of time we spend worrying.
Our best problem solving resource is peace. Solutions arise easily and naturally out of a peaceful state. Often, fear and anxiety block solutions. Anxiety gives power to the problem, not the solution. It does not help to harbor turmoil. It does not help.
Peace is available if we choose it. In spite of chaos and unsolved problems around us, all is well. Things will work out. We can surround ourselves with the resources of the Universe: water, earth, a sunset, a walk, a prayer, a friend. We can relax and let ourselves feel peace.
Today, I will let go of my need to stay in turmoil. I will cultivate peace and trust that timely solutions and goodness will arise naturally and harmoniously out of the wellspring of peace. I will consciously let go and let God.” Source; November 13: Peace | Language of Letting Go
“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Step Three of Al-Anon; Surrendering to a Power greater than ourselves is how we become empowered. We become empowered in a new, better, more effective way than we believed possible. Doors open. Windows open. Possibilities occur. Our energy becomes channeled, at last, in areas and ways that work for us. We become in tune with the Plan for our life and our place in the Universe. And there is a Plan and Place for us. We shall see that. We shall know that. The Universe will open up and make a special place for us, with all that we need provided. It will be good. Understand that it is good, now. Learning to own our power will come, if we are open to it. We do not need to stop at powerlessness and helplessness. That is a temporary place where we re-evaluate where we have been trying to have power when we have none. Once we surrender, it is time to become empowered. Let the power come, naturally. It is there. It is ours. Today, I will be open to understanding what it means to own my power. I will accept powerlessness where I have no power; I will also accept the power that is mine to receive.” Source: November 11: Surrender | Language of Letting Go
The desire that you have in your soul to become whatever you want to become is real. It’s a part of you that is calling out to be seen, heard, felt and acted on. Whatever you want to become, know this: you ALREADY ARE.
So stop trying to become it. Instead, act as if you already are it and watch how magically life unfolds.
Instead of pining or buying into doubt – start TAKING ACTION as if you already are what you want to become.
In other words – BE WHAT YOU SEEK!
Start putting yourself in places and environments that are in alignment with your dreams. Want to be an actor? Get your ass to LA or NY and start doing what actors do. What to be a writer? Start taking actions that writers write and be in environments that writers are in. What to get in shape? Put yourself in health and fitness environments. Stop hanging out at McDonalds and start hanging out at the gym. Don’t bring unhealthy food into the house.
Our environment, far greater than anything else, dictates the quality AND trajectory of our life. If you want to be a painter, go be with painters and start creating rituals that a painter would have. If you want to start a business, be around other entrepreneurs, absorb news on entrepreneurs and get busy taking risks like entrepreneurs do.
Also, and this is VERY important – surround yourself with people who already have what you want. If you hang out with people who have never achieved the dream you’re dreaming – they are probably going to give you bad advice. Most people aren’t living their dream – most people are living their nightmare and so they will give you advice on how to live your nightmare, too.
Environment plays a major role in how your life will turn out – so does the types of people you are hanging with. If you want your dreams to come true, start hanging in places where they already are and with people who can help guide your way. It’s possible to achieve your dreams; you just gotta make sure you are on the side of making them come true, instead of doubting that they exist. Show people who are living their nightmare that it’s totally possible to live their dreams by showing them yours. Be a light.
Know that you already are the dream and start taking action until you produce the result in real life. Keep going. Try until it happens and don’t stop until then.
One of my favorite things about life is that we all get a chance, once a day, to start over.
The morning comes bearing gifts of renewal, redemption and a chance to start all over again. The fresh dew on the Spring leaves glimmer as the sun is just starting to poke her head out from the horizon and imbue each morning with the promise of revival. Moments like these remind me that life goes on.
And not only does life go on, but this very morning you have a chance to make a new decision about HOW it goes. I know I don’t get it perfect; I mess up every day. I try to kick sugar and I fail 20 times a week. But I try and try again. And each day I am closer to my result.
The same thing goes for goals, achieving dreams and the quality of your life. You may not have gotten it perfect in the past, but perfection is never what we can really achieve – only progress. When you stop trying to be perfect and embrace progress OVER perfection – you free yourself to live a life on your terms. We, my friend, are human beings, and by our very nature are not perfect.
But what we can do is welcome the promise of the morning, of each new day that reminds us that we can try again and today get it 1% more right. We can be 1% more on our own side, we can love ourselves 1% more and we can come 1% closer to our dreams.
You and I don’t need to get it all done today, because we can’t; but we can achieve 1% more than we did yesterday. We can forgive ourselves 1% more than we did yesterday. We can show up for our loved ones more than we did yesterday.
The promise of the morning inspires me every day. Today, I am to do 1% better than I did yesterday. Day-by-day, slowly but surely these small incremental changes will bring about MASSIVE change in our lives.
Embrace the promise of renewal each morning, and for today, don’t try to be perfect, just be 1% better than you were yesterday.
One sweltering summer day, I sought escape from the heat at a nearby beach. Lying there with my lemonade, I looked at all the people soaking up the sun. No matter how many people were on that beach, there would be enough sun for everyone. I realized that the same was true of God’s love and guidance. No matter how many people seek a Higher Power’s help, there is always enough to go around. To someone who believed that there was never enough time, money, love, or anything else, this was amazing news!
This awareness was tested at an Al-Anon meeting when someone spoke about his Higher Power with a personal love and intensity that matched my own. I felt as if his intimacy with God would leave less love for me. But I think that the opposite is true. I often feel closest to my “Higher Power” when I hear others share about how well a Higher Power has taken care of them. Today I try to remember that there is enough love for us all…
“Humility is recognition of truth. Your worldly accomplishments are a gift bestowed upon you by the Uni-verse, nothing is possible without the support of the invisible realm of the Infinite Mystery. When you know that you actually do nothing and are simply a channel for the Good, Abundance, Joy and Peace that already existed before your birth to be rearranged to your preference you will be in harmony with Life. The minute you buy into being the doer of anything you have taken yourself out of the flow and stepped back into Ego thinking. All things have been created by the Joyful will of the Infinite Mystery, Life is an experience of making choices about how you want to arrange things in your life. You can choose to arrange things in a Fearful, Egoic way, or you can choose to arrange things in a Loving and Joyful way. When you choose Love and Joy you align with the greatest and highest Good and begin to express your unique creative perspective while at the same time feeling a oneness with everyone else. This will leave you with a feeling of wholeness, joy, peace and gratitude.”
Acknowledge your pain. Then you can begin to identify the source of it, and in identifying, you can begin to heal. When we open ourselves to emotions, we don’t just get the good ones, like happiness or relief. Feelings are a package deal. We get the entire emotional range.
Pain and suffering are part of the experience of being alive. Things go wrong. Lovers leave us, parents and sometimes children die. We fall, we fail. Don’t hide from your pain.
Don’t bury it under a shell of drugs, alcohol, or shallow achievement. If you hurt, then hurt. Recognize what you’re going through. Then learn to tell it like it is.
God, help me acknowledge the pain in my life instead of trying to mask it with mood-altering substances or mindless busywork. Teach me to say what hurts. Show me what it is that I need to do to heal; then give me the strength to do that.
Fun becomes fun, love becomes love, life becomes worth living. And we become grateful. —Beyond Codependency Wait, and expect good things—for yourself and your loved ones. When you wonder what is coming, tell yourself the best is coming, the very best life and love have to offer, the best God and His universe have to send. Then open your hands to receive it. Claim it, and it is yours. See the best in your mind; envision what it will look like, what it will feel like. Focus, until you can see it clearly. Let your whole being, body and soul, enter into and hold onto the image for a moment. Then, let it go. Come back into today, the present moment. Do not obsess. Do not become fearful. Become excited. Live today fully, expressing gratitude for all you have been, all you are, and all you will become. Wait, and expect good things. Today, when I think about the year ahead, I will focus on the good that is coming.
More healthy thinking from Melody Beattie…
“We are the greatest thing that will ever happen to us. Believe It. It makes life much easier.” – Codependent No More
Bright, shiny objects! 
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