Everyone’s looking forward to the weekend, so on Fridays I focus on the future…
Terri Cole writes:
It is an annual occurrence. We run on autopilot from Thanksgiving through Christmas, and then around December 26, we start to think about new habits we want to create and bad habits we want to ditch. We evaluate what hasn’t been serving our purpose and what we need to change in order to be more fulfilled. For some reason, we have a difficult time implementing new strategies in the present moment. It’s as if we must wait for a momentous occasion that clearly marks new beginnings.
Does the split second between December 31 and January 1 possess some kind of transformational magic? Do we really need a specific calendar date to create our best lives?
Nope. We really don’t.
The biggest challenge is realizing the potential for renewal you have in every moment. If you focus on staying present instead of mulling over the past or anxiously awaiting the future, you can harness the power of your intention and make what seems impossible, possible. Obsessing about what you did and did not do in the past and fearfully projecting into the future is your fear mind limiting your potential.
Once you release the fear, you can stay rooted in the here and now and develop present moment awareness. You can begin to truly discover what you want more and less of in your life based on who you are NOW rather than on how you have behaved in the past.
Recognize you are a work in progress, which is a process that thankfully never ends. Realize that at any moment you can declare a Do Over—to create that magic split second of New Year’s transformation—any day of the week.
You can decide right now that negative experiences from your past will not predict your future. Now is not then, and no matter how familiar it may feel, this present moment has never happened before. Instead of fearing what may happen, harness the mind-blowing power of your intention to create what you want to happen.
Whether it’s now because New Years is right around the corner, or at any other time throughout the year, here is a great exercise to get you on the path to sustainable change.
Full story at: Creating A New You For The New Year!.
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” ~Paul Boese
Get the answer here: Why Forgiveness Doesn’t Work and How to Change That | Tiny Buddha.
If someone is late about 70% of the time, and you expect them to be on time, that’s a rather foolish prediction, isn’t it? They may be on time, but they probably won’t be.
What many people will do is get angry with the friend who’s frequently late. Does this usually change that person’s behavior? Perhaps sometimes, but it usually has little or no effect. The person will most likely continue being late at roughly the same frequency.
Wanting a person to change doesn’t change their behavior. It’s more likely to cement the behavior in place since people tend to resist others’ demands of them.
Instead of resisting your predictions, a more sensible approach is to accept them. Accept that your friend will probably continue to be late most of the time.
Note that this doesn’t mean predicting that your friend will always be late, so you can be pleasantly surprised when they’re on time. That would be inaccurate as well. It means accepting that you don’t really know when they’ll show up and that most likely they’ll be later than they say they will. Predict based on reality, not on overly positive or negative expectations. In many cases your prediction will be a spectrum of possible outcomes with some being more probable than others.
Now your friend may change their behavior over time, but when such changes are going to occur, you’ll typically see advance evidence of them. Is your friend committed to becoming more punctual? If so, is there any physical evidence other than empty promises? For instance, when you visit your friend’s home, do you see books like How to Be Punctual lying around? Does your friend share details of their efforts to change? In other words, do you have some solid evidence that this habit will in fact be corrected?
Let me put this another way. If someone said they’d bet you $100 that your friend would be late most of the time for all get-togethers for the next six months, would you take that bet (meaning that you’re betting that your friend will usually be on time)? If you wouldn’t take the bet, it’s fair to say you expect the old behavior to continue.
If there’s no evidence of change, then your best prediction of future behavior is past behavior. In this case, the past does equal the future.
If your current prediction is that the old behavior is likely to continue, then go ahead and project this expectation forward in time for at least a decade. In the absence of clear evidence to the contrary, it’s reasonable to expect that this pattern will continue year after year for at least the next 10 years.
Now do your best to accept this prediction without resistance. Don’t try to alter it for emotional reasons.
The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior, so if you’re clear about the past behavior, you can reasonably expect that it will continue as-is for the most part, absent any serious commitment to alter course. Change is always possible, but entertain the possibility that it may not happen.
Now with this newfound acceptance in mind, how does that affect your relationship with your friend? Does it mandate that you kick this person out of your life? Not necessarily. What it means is that you can now account for the likelihood that this person will be late most of the time. This means your decisions will be more intelligent since they’ll be based on more accurate predictions, not on false hopes.” via How to Stop Being Disappointed.
My old friend RJ always says that when it comes to people what you got is what you’ll get; we can hope that people change but to expect otherwise is an invitation to disappointment. Stop wrestling with pigs!!!
If you had a rocky childhood, it doesn’t have to ruin your adulthood.
If you are in a career that doesn’t fulfill you, you can do something new.
If you are in a toxic relationship, you can change the rules or move on.
If you were in an unhealthy relationship in the past, it doesn’t mean your next relationship can’t be wonderful.
If you have lived in the same place forever, you can find new scenery that stimulates your growth.
If you have been overweight for most of your life, you can get healthy today.
If you are addicted to alcohol, drugs, food or anything else, you can seek help now.
Just because you have always done it one way doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it that way.
No matter what road you’re on, no matter how long you have been on it, no matter who you are traveling it with, it is never too late to change direction.
Looking back and wishing you could change history or have done something differently is a waste of energy. Keep moving forward.
Your past doesn’t define your future.
Show me a modern political candidate who doesn’t understand television, and I’ll show you a loser.When TV became the dominant medium for Americans to consume news and entertainment, political candidates could no longer be successful without looking polished in televised debates, appearing on talk shows and spending big on commercials.Like the television boom of the 1960s, we are standing on the precipice of a big shift in how public figures are perceived and how campaigns are conducted. Our frontier is social media, and its impact on mainstream political culture is coming on fast.While my colleagues have been making their predictions about what’s on the tech and social media horizon in 2011, there will be no major U.S. elections next year. Here, we’ll be postulating about social media’s impact on the more long-term future of American civics.
You can read the rest of the article here if you’d like: 4 Predictions for the Future of Politics and Social Media.
- 2011 PR Predictions (gutenbergpr.com)
- 4 Winning Strategies for Social Media Optimization (e1evation.com)
- Predictions for 2011 (curiouslypersistent.wordpress.com)
“So, there’s plenty of bad economic news floating around. From the price of oil to Wall Street to bailouts to the death of traditional advertising.
Which is great news for anyone hoping to grow or to make an impact.
Change (and the fortunes that go with it) is almost always made during the down part of the cycle. It might not be fun, but it’s exciting. (Where do you think Google came from?) The opportunity is to find substantial opportunities (in any field) that deliver real value and have a future. Those jobs/investments/companies/ideas are undervalued right now, but not for long.” Click here to go to the source…