Counseling Services – Bright, shiny objects!

Cynthia Belmer shares this:

What makes a relationship work? What can couples do to stay happy in their relationship, especially in this modern age with stress all around us?

Everyone wants to make their relationship last and everyone wants to feel loved, happy, and in harmony with their partner, but few experience it.

Harmony is about a mutual agreement of giving and receiving in the most balanced, loving and humble way, while maintaining the space needed for self-nurturing and self-love. You can realize it and live it in your relationship when you:

1. Become best friends. Understand the likes, dislikes, the fears, the pain and the gain of your partner and ask open-ended questions.

2. Explore your common vision for the future. Discuss your goals and your visions for the future. How does a great and lasting relationship look like to you? Follow through with this view and commit to realizing and nurturing it.

3. Be humble. Take responsibility of our own actions and say that you’re sorry when you mess up.

4. Be generous. Allow yourself to give with humbleness, to appreciate with love, to forgive with softness, to listen with care and to compromise while receiving your needs in return.

5. Invest in your own and constant self-growth. Follow through with your interests, your goals, your emotional needs and wants and share them with your partner.

6. Trust. Speak your truth, always and allow both of your fears to surface and share them gently together.

7. Listen and never forget. Listen very carefully to your partner and remember what interests them, what they enjoy, they dislike and most importantly, remember their stories.

8. Allow spaciousness. Give some alone time to yourself and your partner and do unique things that you enjoy and that make you feel good.

9. Get intimate. Express your love through hugging, kissing, caressing, cuddling, holding, and other forms of physical affection.

10. Have faith. Never give up on realizing the picture of a great relationship, especially when going through a big storm.

So my question to you is: If you were to make a change so you could live happily and in harmony in your relationship, what would you be doing?

via The Secrets That Keep Happy Couples Together.

Kristin Barton Cuthriell writes:

Often, people come into counseling because something in their lives is not working for them. They may be depressed. They may have anxiety. Their marriage may be falling apart. Maybe they have been grieving old wounds for years, and they just can’t find joy in life. Teenagers may be rebelling. People feel stuck in dead-end jobs. Addictions are impacting the family. People have lost the ability to let life in.

People want help. They want to feel better. Some, come in with an open mind and are ready to look at things in new ways; do things in new ways. They are ready to change. Others, however, resist change, no matter how bad they feel. They continue to do the same thing over and over again, bringing them the same undesirable results.

We are creatures of habit. We often resist change and stay with the status quo no matter how miserable we feel. We avoid doing something different.

We must stop and think about what we are doing. We must ask ourselves if what we are doing is working for us. We need to remember that if we always do what we have always done, we will always get what we have always gotten.

Let go of always being right.

Let go of thinking that there is only one way to do something.

If it is not working for you, try something different.

Be open to suggestions.

Open your mind… or you may miss something.” via Open Your Mind… or you may miss something.

One of the tools I use to keep my mind open is this quote: Nietszche said “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.” I agree with Kristin! Let go of always being right — it’s a terrible burden to bear and you’ll feel much better when you put it down… :-D

I stumbled upon this this morning…

Communication is a key part to building a healthy relationship. The first step is making sure you both want and expect the same things — being on the same page is very important. The following tips can help you create and maintain a healthy relationship:

Speak Up. In a healthy relationship, if something is bothering you, it’s best to talk about it instead of holding it in.

Respect Your Partner. Your partner’s wishes and feelings have value. Let your significant other know you are making an effort to keep their ideas in mind. Mutual respect is essential in maintaining healthy relationships.

Compromise. Disagreements are a natural part of healthy relationships, but it’s important that you find a way to compromise if you disagree on something. Try to solve conflicts in a fair and rational way.

Be Supportive. Offer reassurance and encouragement to your partner. Also, let your partner know when you need their support. Healthy relationships are about building each other up, not putting each other down.

Respect Each Other’s Privacy. Just because you’re in a relationship, doesn’t mean you have to share everything and constantly be together. Healthy relationships require space.

Source: Healthy Relationships | www.loveisrespect.org

Go to the source if you’d like to know more…

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