A few weeks ago, a friend recommended a book about Self-compassion, so I started to look into this subject and realized that most people, including myself, do not practice Self-compassion very well. However, we live in a culture where Self-esteem is an obsession, so I wanted to look into the differences between these two.

I have always tried to be a better person, a better student, a better daughter, a better wife, a better mother, a better professional, etc. the list goes on and on. I always try to be better, and although there is nothing wrong with trying to be better, I feel like it is a constant source of self-inflicted pressure in my life.

I believe that many people go through the same pattern of trying to always be better in order to feel accepted and loved, yet, somewhere along the way they forget to love themselves

As I say at the beginning of this video (closing the compassion gap) ‘what unites us in our vulnerability’.

I am noticing in my work and my life alongside my family and friends that compassion is more fully released and expressed through adversity and grief being acknowledged and validated. Our shared experience of pain and loss unlocks the energy and intention to meet suffering with kindness; this is our loving nature. Compassion is not partial, it should not be ‘reserved for patients’ – this is pity and is smothering. Compassion is all round us, literally right under our noses as kindness is never more than a breath away.

In health and social care there is a paradox – a subtle violence is done to those who struggle daily to show compassion (often in spite of the task and process driven system and culture) by not asking them about the impact…