3 Important Boundaries That Every Couple Should Have

Modern problems require modern solutions—especially in relationships. Source: 3 Important Boundaries That Every Couple Should Have

 

Breadcrumbing: What it means and examples in dating or relationships

Toxic “breadcrumbing,” common in today’s dating scene, can seriously harm someone’s mental state or outlook on relationships. Here’s how to spot the behavior and heal. Source: Breadcrumbing: What it means and examples in dating or relationships | CNN

 

Put on Your Attachment Hat & Change your Romantic Attachment Style

“A lot of times couples think they’re fighting about someone coming home late or chores. But what they’re really fighting about is, do you see me? Do you value me? Do you need me? Can I count on you and until that gets addressed and articulated they’re unlikely to be able to resolve conflict.” 

Ashley Harvey

In a talk that will leave you feeling both stirred up and optimistic, university professor and relationship educator Ashley Harvey shares five principles from attachment theory that you can use to understand and change your attachment style so that you can decrease conflict and increase connection in your romantic relationships. In a talk that will leave you feeling both stirred up and optimistic, university professor and relationship educator Ashley Harvey shares five principles from attachment theory that you can use to understand and change your attachment style so that you can decrease conflict and increase connection in your romantic relationships. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx



Attachment theory is the science of love

Understanding Attachment Theory: A Fundamental Framework for Human Relationships

Attachment theory, pioneered by British psychologist John Bowlby, has significantly shaped our comprehension of human bonds and relationships. This influential framework offers profound insights into the development of emotional connections, spanning across various stages of life. Let’s delve into the core concepts of attachment theory and its implications for understanding human behavior and interaction.

The Foundation of Attachment Theory

At the heart of attachment theory lies the idea that the quality of early relationships, particularly with primary caregivers, profoundly impacts an individual’s emotional and social development. Bowlby proposed that the nature of these initial attachments sets the stage for one’s perception of self, others, and relationships.

Continue reading “Attachment theory is the science of love”

The Healing Power of Touch: New Scientific Insights

A new study presents novel insights on the mental health benefits of touch. Source: The Healing Power of Touch: New Scientific Insights

Why Do Women Like Men With Dad Bods?

The Dad Bod is appealing for reasons beyond physical attractiveness. Source: Why Do Women Like Men With Dad Bods?

Readers do you think this is true?

Communication Equals Better Sex

Sex can be much better when it is talked about, explained, and demonstrated. Source: Communication Equals Better Sex

7 Perils of Divorce Later in Life

Divorce after 50 or “gray divorce” is more common, bringing unique challenges. Source: 7 Perils of Divorce Later in Life

Cliteracy

Men, these three videos changed my life forever. Women, this is the link you want to send to your partner…




Bonus video!

7 Common Reasons Romantic Relationships Fail

Most of us go into a relationship with the idea that it will last. We hope we find the right person who understands us, relates to us, and has similar goals and interests as we do. Yet despite this, many relationships eventually end. While we may romanticize the “perfect” partnership, the reality is that relationships require effort, and both partners actually want the relationship. If goals, aspirations, desires, or needs do not match, this can stress a relationship and may be a contributing factor to its failure. Source: 7 Common Reasons Romantic Relationships Fail | Psychology Today

The Rumi poem we should all read

Elyane Youssef writes “the poem is called “A Great Wagon,” and the middle verse—my favorite—is below:

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
there is a field. I’ll meet you there
.
When the soul lies down in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase “each other”
doesn’t make any sense.
The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.”

This verse highlights three pivotal ideas: the realization of the spiritual realm, and the exploration of non-judgment and oneness.

Some people underestimate spirituality or see it as a trend, but as Pierre Teilhard de Chardin said: “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.”

Rumi explored that truth in his poems. We don’t just live in the spiritual realm, but we are the spiritual realm. To see beyond our physical bodies and realize our true essence has been our purpose since the beginning of time. Rumi wrote about it eight centuries before the extensive spread of spirituality.”: The Rumi Poem we should all Read.

Why Relationships Matter

“Love is one of the most profound emotions known to human beings. There are many kinds of love, but many people seek its expression in a romantic relationship with a compatible partner (or partners). For these individuals, romantic relationships comprise one of the most meaningful aspects of life, and are a source of deep fulfillment.” An excellent selection of articles from Psychology Today: Relationships

Love Actually?

Here are some surprising love lessons from C. S. Lewis. Source: Love Actually?

Cultivating the Ability to Relate After Relational Trauma

Changing maladaptive beliefs and behaviors for better relationships. Source: Cultivating the Ability to Relate After Relational Trauma

Relational Trauma Impacts on Dating and Marriage

Exploring emotional baggage in romantic relationships when we endure trauma. Source: Relational Trauma Impacts on Dating and Marriage

5 Romantic Ideas That May Do More Harm Than Good

My partner suggested we not celebrate Valentine’s Day this year, at least not in a traditional way and I agreed if only because our anniversary 11 days later is much more meaningful to me. Her very name means wisdom and I’m beginning to see why her suggestion made so much sense…

Amy Morin writes “There’s an ironic twist to traditional Valentine’s Day activities—they involve unhealthy relationship habits. Or, at the very least, they romanticize someone else’s unhealthy habits and give us an unrealistic idea of what true love looks like.

As I share in my book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Couples Don’t Do, it only takes one or two counterproductive relationship habits to weaken your bond. And while none of these traditional Valentine’s Day activities are likely to directly lead to divorce court, you might want to think twice about engaging in them this year. These Valentine’s Day activities might backfire and do more harm than good.”

She suggests not listening to ‘romantic music’ which I found interesting. Why? “Love” has remained the most popular word in song lyrics for more than five decades. But over that time, the dysfunctional lyrics have increased—especially when it comes to glamorizing unhealthy romantic behavior.

Eighty-six percent of modern songs contain lyrics that promote unhealthy and insecure romantic attachment. So think twice about that romantic song you’re tempted to turn on—there’s a good chance it normalizes jealousy, objectifies partners, and glorifies unhealthy behavior. That’s probably not the vibe you’re going for on Valentine’s Day.” Go to the source to read about the other 4 ideas: 5 Romantic Ideas That May Do More Harm Than Good

For Lifelong Love, Embrace 3 Key Pathways

Try creating positive Illusions, expressing gratitude, and choosing forgiveness. Source: For Lifelong Love, Embrace 3 Key Pathways

4 Clear Signs to Call Your Relationship Quits

The breaking points for when it’s time to bid adieu to your relationship. Source: 4 Clear Signs to Call Your Relationship Quits

How to Find a Good-for-You Partner

Find love by learning how to look inside for your heart’s desire. Source: How to Find a Good-for-You Partner

How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs

The religious and literary history of “XOXO.” Source: How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs

14 Benefits of Being Single

Singlehood can be much better than being paired — especially with the wrong person. Source: 14 Benefits of Being Single

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